(Closed) Asking carat size…tacky or not??

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 17
Member
1073 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think it’s depends on who is asking and why they are asking. If it’s someone that may get engaged soon (man or woman) and they are asking out of genuine curiosity, then that’s one story. However, if it’s a woman who is engaged/married and just asking to be nosey and/or boast about her ring, I think that is completely tacky and rude!

Post # 18
Member
6524 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Merinda1994:  yes, I agree. TBH, when Fiance proposed, I didn’t even ask how big it was!!! I only knew because he said these are the papers you will need for the insurance LoL 

Post # 19
Member
1633 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Merinda1994:  oops I wrote that as if it only happened once.  It’s actually quite a common question I get even now 3 years married lol. 

 

 

 

Post # 20
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Merinda1994:  I don’t find it tacky at all.  I am always happy to tell them.  What makes you find it tacky?  

Post # 21
Member
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

No one has ever asked me how many carats, they just say “that’s huge!” Lol

Post # 22
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@CurlyCue:  I get asked that all the time, and I am always proud to tell them what Fiance does.  We can afford it and I never find it a tacky/ off-putting question.  Sure, we are all currently living in a financially-sensitive time, but I find that most people who ask that question just honestly want to know how he was able to afford it.  And what’s the shame in being asked that?  What’s the shame in answering the question? 

Post # 24
Member
2868 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Yea I think it’s rude and awkward.  I’ve definitely been curious about the size of other people’s rings, not for competitive purposes but just because I like rings and want more info about them, but I would NEVER ask.

Post # 25
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Merinda1994:  BUt why is that a problem?  I just don’t understand it.  If someone asks me what my Fiance does (as an independent question), I am perfectly fine telling them.  If someone asks me what my Fiance does in connection with the size of my ring,  I am also perfectly fine telling them.  My view is that, if i’m okay talking about FI’s job in any other situation, I should be okay talking about it in response to my ring.  They don’t need to know, but it’s okay that they want to know.  

Post # 28
Member
1258 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would personally never ask UNLESS the diamond was huge and in that case I figure they want people to notice it and expect it.

I also think it’s a little tacky to ask someone that.

Post # 29
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Merinda1994:  Ahh, I can see how the manner of asking can be intrusive sometimes.  I totally get it.  I never have a problem answering the question (as in I don’t find the question itself tacky), but sometimes I do find the person asking the question a little intrusive.  It usually is a matter of how the question is asked, not what is asked.  But I am proud of Fiance, his job, and how much we are able to make and save during the year.  So I am a little less sensitive with regards to questions touching on financial ability.  Sorry if my response sounded like it was attacking your point of view!! 

Post # 30
Member
463 posts
Helper bee

I vote super tacky.

I don’t know the carat size of any of my relatives’ or friends’ rings – even my own mother. I would never ask.

Post # 31
Member
756 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My ring is probably pretty normally sized here on the bee, but it’s considered big for my area. I get comments on it all the time from people I know and strangers. I think it’s rude to ask the size, but I tell people if they ask. Honestly, the “what does your Darling Husband do for a living?/Are you married to a doctor?/That’s huge” statements immediately after looking at my ring are ruder though to me. I would rather someone say oh that’s pretty or some nice comment before asking those kinds of questions. 

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