(Closed) Asking carat size…tacky or not??

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 77
Member
9538 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have no idea how many carat’s my ring is. So I guess I’m lucky that nobody has ever asked. But I would find it extremely distasteful if someone did ask. I would never dream of asking someone else, unless we were super close and I was ring shopping, which means that will probably never happen. 

 

Post # 78
Member
9947 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

From a “traditional” point of view…

Asking questions about money, wealth or possessions… is indeed a tacky thing to do.

So ya, I’d be quite taken back if someone asked me “how many carats is your ring”… “how big is your diamond” etc

I would avoid answering such questions (change the subject)

And if the person was persistent, then ya, it wouldn’t be beyond me to be snarky in my reply… as it truly is none of their business… more so, if it is someone that I wasn’t close to.

Such private info, I don’t normally share with others.

 

Post # 79
Member
1000 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Tacky. I’ve also been asked my specs…

Post # 80
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I hate it, and my feelings change depending on who asks. I am a waitress so it does get noticed a lot, I find men ask more then women (size/price). I still get taken back and usually say ” I dont know “.  I really think people who ask dont mean it in a judgy way, but some of my female co workers ask and I feel they are judging/comparing. 

Whole thing is a bit awkward lol!

Post # 81
Member
3422 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

It doesn’t bother me..people try to guess before they ask. I notice people that aren’t engaged are the ones asking So I conclude they are generally curious. I don’t find it to be rude at all. It’s just a piece of jewelry I can’t figure out why this would irk people.

Post # 82
Member
290 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Random people asking = tacky. I started asking my very best friends/sisters about their specs when Fiance and I were waist deep in diamond shopping. I just wanted an idea of what the specs looked like in real life because they all have beautiful diamonds that I know aren’t all flawless 2-carat Ds

Post # 83
Member
421 posts
Helper bee

I think it depends on how close you are to the person. If it was me and my close girls i wouldn’t feel offended, but if it was someone not so close i would say tacky!

Post # 84
Member
576 posts
Busy bee

I don’t think I’ve ever asked someone in person, now that I think about it. I have a few times online but I’m a big jewelry lover and I ask on jewelry themed sites so its kind of a duh if something is missing carat weight you want to know.

Truthfully though, if I were to be asking for rude reasons/wanting to know how much they spent, I’d ask about color or clarity before carat. XD I’m jk by the way, never done that! However I have unashamedly asked about the buying process that went into picking out the ring because A) most of the stats come out about the ring/stone as the owner is excited to share and B) if I truly like their jewelry piece and ask questions its out of respect and admiration and C) if its a beautiful piece I want to know where it was from, I’m always on the lookout for new stores/vendors for jewelry.

Post # 85
Member
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Merinda1994:  I find it offensive but I was only asked by one person, and I knew the reason she asked is that she wanted to make sure that when she was engaged that hers was bigger.  Her response when I told her my carat size was that when she got engaged, she needed at least 2 carats.

Post # 86
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think its Tacky!!!

Im recently engaged & I’ve gotten the whole “He isnt even a doctor yet how did he afford that thing” or ” wow a yellow diamond those are expensive” and then the classic “how many Carats is it” .. ironically none of my sisters, mom, aunts,  or close friends have posed the questions just random co-workers and strangers! To which I kindly say its the perfect size for me!

The whole how could he afford that thing question got a mean stare.. like really why are u all in my Fiance’s personal business and finances that has nothing to do with u!

& the yellow diamond is expensive thing has been brushed off by.. “yea i heard they say a yellow diamond is as rare as the woman who wears one” 😉

Some people are genuienly just curious, but it can still come off offensive!

Post # 87
Member
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Merinda1994:  I would consider this question generally impolite, but it depends.

I actually do not want to know any of my friends carat sizes. I couldn’t help but compare, and that particular competition is so useless. (I love jewellery, so of course I’m curious, but it’s better IMO if we don’t know.)

An exception would be if it was someone that I know well and who is in the market for a diamond ring. Then I would answer. Or, when I got engaged and I was showing my ring to my married sister- because we noticed out center stones are precisely the same size. Then we talked about how nice the size was and how we love our rings. That was nice. I remember when she got engaged, I thought the ring she chose looked nice on her hand. 

 

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