Asking for parents\' blessing after the engagement: together?

posted 1 year ago in Proposals
Post # 2
Member
2731 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I’m not sure bee.. I personally wouldn’t ask the question if you might receive an answer your don’t want. Would your parents be upset if they know you asked for their blessing, but didn’t care about the answer because you’re already engaged anyways? At this point I would just announce it.

Post # 3
Member
359 posts
Helper bee

Do you have any reason to fear that your parents won’t support you? Neither of us wanted to ask a blessing, but we also know that both our parents love their future in-law. I would say something like, “Dad/mom… I wanted to let you know we are planning on getting married. I love you very much and so does (partner) so it’s important to us that we told you right away. I know you will support us through this. Will you give us your blessing?”

When I’m not 100% sure of how someone will take things, I always say, “I know that you will support…” and THEN ask the question, at which point they are hard-pressed to disagree.

Post # 4
Member
418 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I would word it like marlos  said. We are doing this, we love you, we would love your blessing

Post # 5
Member
7852 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think you could just say something like “We have some really happy news to share – we’re engaged! Your support means so much to us, so we wanted to ask if you would give us your blessing as we take this next step in life together.” Asking for their blessing is not the same as asking for permission, so I think you can do it retroactively. Do you have any reason to worry they won’t be supportive?

Post # 6
Member
56 posts
Worker bee

My fiance didn’t ask for a blessing and instead we called them right after we got engaged and he said: “I know I didn’t ask for your blessing before, but I hope I have your blessing.” He and I are both on good terms with them and that’s all we needed to say. They were a bit shocked and also thrilled. 

Post # 7
Member
6396 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

I agree that you should simply announce it. How will you feel if they say no? I’d imagine you wouldn’t feel so great, so don’t give them an open door to hurt you.

Post # 8
Member
1235 posts
Bumble bee

I would simply tell them that you’re engaged. I’m sure if they have something to say they would. Otherwise I would take it as blessing is given.

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