(Closed) Asking Friends to be Bridesmaids

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Nope never upset about being a bridesmaid.  I was flattered and seriously honored at being picked.  Maybe before you ask them you could figure out what exactly your expectations of them are, and talk to them about it.  Will they just need to get a dress and show up or are you looking for help with all your DIY projects etc.  Maybe once you have that figured out you can see who the best candidates are.

Post # 4
Member
238 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

This is just me, but I don’t think a casting call would be appropriate at all. Do people actually do this? If you know someone well enough to ask them, you should probably already know whether or not they would be good at it. I’m sorry to sound so harsh.  I guess I see bridesmaids as being more of an honorary thing- I won’t be expecting mine to do any work or spend too much of their time helping with my wedding. Maybe you are expecting a little too much from yours? To answer your last question, I would be thrilled to be asked to be a bridesmaid, but at the same time I would not assume that I was taking on any really major responsibilities in becoming one.

Post # 6
Member
584 posts
Busy bee

Maybe you should have them submit wedding resumes and see how much they’re willing to spend on a dress? Wink Only kidding; I must say I’ve always felt honored to be a bridesmaid and I think your friends will appreciate the gesture! Even the ones who aren’t super girly or wedding-obsessed; it’s a fun, happy time and a great way for them to show their support for you and your man.

Post # 7
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

The only time I ever felt kind of awkward about it was when a non-close family member asked me. We don’t talk much, so it was kind of weird. However, I’ve always been honored to do it for a friend! If you’re worried about them feeling pressured, I would just talk each one you want individually and tell them you understand if they’re too busy or whatever. That way they don’t have to refuse you (which I doubt they would) publicly and they’ll have a nice out. And calm down, you’re going to drive yourself crazy! 🙂

Post # 8
Member
238 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Haha OK I clearly should’ve had my coffee this morning! Seriously though, if you are reasonable about your expectations then your friends will be excited to be your bridesmaids. I know it can feel awkward, but chances are your closest friends are already half expecting it.  I didn’t even have to tell my sister that she would be my Maid/Matron of Honor, and one of my good friends from home already called dibs on being a bridesmaid a year before I even got engaged! So you will just be sort of reaffirming your closeness to them.

Post # 9
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

They’re your friends, right? Be straight with them. Tell them that you’d like them to be a bridesmaid but you understand that some women don’t like being bridesmaids due to the time and expense involved, so you are 100% okay with them saying no if they don’t want to do it. Then tell them to think it over and get back to you. If you don’t hear back, assume they don’t want to do it. 

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