(Closed) Assuming guests

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

gee facebook makes wedding planning much tougher! lol

sorry it happened, I guess learn from the lesson and no more wedding stuff on fb part from… sending out invitations today! no invitation, no enterance 😛

Post # 4
714 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Miss Manners recommends replying that you’re just having a very small, family wedding. 

Post # 5
1166 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

The simplest way to “let them down easy” is not to send them an invitation. 🙂  (And isn’t the fact that you haven’t friended them on Facebook an indication that you’re not as close with them as with your other friends?)

Post # 6
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

this is one of the many reasons why facebook is no place for wedding info. unless you have strict privacy settings, a lot more people than just your immediate friends can see your info. at this point you can either say you’re having a smaller wedding, or let them figure out they’re not invited when no invitation comes in the mail. of course then you run the risk of that very persistent person calling you to let you know their invitation got lost in the mail.

i am super reluctant to talk about the wedding when in a group because there’s always someone around who won’t be invited. any of our friends who have had weddings already understand how hard it is to keep the guest list manageable, but a lot of my friends aren’t married yet and i think some of them think it’s like having a birthday party out at a bar, where everyone you were ever friends with is invited. i’m not looking forward to some of them realizing that no invitation is coming their way…

Post # 7
196 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

When I listed my status as “engaged” on Facebook, I found myself bombarded with emails wanting to know all about the details. As much as I don’t mind sharing with my close friends and family, I didn’t need 100 other people that I might have met once thinking they were coming to my wedding. I already have enough trouble with my grandmother inviting people I haven’t been around since I was, oh, 2 or 3, I didn’t need random Facebook people showing up too.

I just don’t divulge all the details, like date and location, to anyone outside of my family and friends circle. Of course, when I do get asked by someone I don’t know that well, I am sure to mention that it will be a small ceremony with close family and friends only, since we’re on a strict budget, to avoid them casually inviting themselves.

I would say just don’t send them an invitation, and adjust privacy settings, or avoid mentioning all the little details online. That should help.

Post # 8
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I kept ALL my wedding info completely off of FB, minus my ‘engaged’ status. Seriously though I ahve no idea WHY people would ever assume they are invited, but since they said that you have to let them down.

You should just say that it’s really sweet of them to think of you and want to attend your wedding, but unfortunately due to budget constraints it’s going to be a very small event. Write them a private message though, don’t post it out for everyone to see!

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