(Closed) At the end of my rope. My husband is abusive.

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
4893 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

Do you have somewhere to go until you can get a permanent place? Because you definitely need to pack up and leave, for your own safety! And then file for divorce. 

Post # 4
295 posts
Helper bee

Run. Run as fast as you can. He didn’t deserve your kindness the first time he hit you.

Post # 5
7285 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Leave. Seriously, if someone chokes you, you leave.

Maybe, with time and a lot of therapy for both of you (because you do throw fuel to the fire, even if you don’t mean to, so you need better skills and tools to cope with his brokenness), and the right meds for him, maybe you’d have a chance. But nothing good will come of sticking around when the relationship has already turned violent.

Post # 6
4049 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

He’s tried to choke you… more than once? Yes, the man doesn’t deserve your kindness. Kick his ass to the curb and never regret it.

Post # 7
3778 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@CorvusCorax:  (hugs). I’m not going to tell you to leave him, because you already know you should. I’m not going to point out all the warning signs of an abuser, because you already know them. I’m just going to leave this link to my survival story and hope that you get out before you wind up in the same position I did. 


My Survival Story (Warning: Pics, Possible Triggers)

Post # 8
12248 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m SO sorry you’re in SUCH a horrifying situation!

Definitely get somewhere safe. And be confident in your decision!

Post # 9
2037 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m sorry you are dealing with this.  Take it from someone who knows–it will only get worse, become more frequent and you do NOT want to be in a position where you almost die and have to get a restraining order before you have literally RUN away just to live.

Good luck and my heart breaks for you.  I’m here if you need me feel free to PM. 

Post # 10
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@CorvusCorax:  Pack your stuff and leave.  He ex-military and abusive plus he doesn’t take his meds or attend counseling for his issues.  Unacceptable and dangerous as all F-ING get out.  You need to leave on your own two feet rather than in a body bag.  You’re lucky he only punches computer screens; what if it was the final straw and he finally snapped the other night and bashed your face in instead of the monitor?  Absolutely F-ING not.  Pack your stuff and leave, now, not tomorrow, not next week, right F-ING now.

Post # 11
481 posts
Helper bee

Wow, VERY scary. I think I agree with the PP’s that you’d better GTFO ASAP. 


Post # 12
839 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@CorvusCorax:  Please leave, as soon as you can. I am reeling from reading your story, and I can’t believe he’s done this much to you already. He’s not safe to be around, especially when he’s not taking his medication. I had an ex boyfriend (also ex military, also off his medication) threaten to hit me, and I am lucky I left before he actually did. Don’t let him do worse to you than he already has. 

Post # 13
2555 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

This is so dangerous. Leave. And if you need someone to talk to, feel free to PM.

Post # 14
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I am so so so sorry you are going through this. Please, do the best thing for yourself. Pack your bags, and go. You cannot fix him, and he doesn’t seem to want to try. You made vows, sure, but he broke them the second he laid an angry hand on you. 

When you do leave, please have somebody with you, or so it when he is not home. You need to take ever measure to ensure your safety.

I don’t typically pray, but I am praying for you.

Post # 15
2522 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Yep, pack your stuff and leave.  Speak to an attorney ASAP.  Please, DO NOT TRUST HIM to say he will change or give him anymore chances.  Your life is more important than this horrible marriage.

Post # 16
755 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’m very sorry – sounds extremely frustrating and dangerous! I think it’s easier said than done to leave but it sounds like you are finally fed up. At the very least I hope seperation can get him on the right path with his behavior. I would not put up with anything physical and I hope you do not continue too.  


The topic ‘At the end of my rope. My husband is abusive.’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors