Post # 1
Yesterday, I got a shower invitation for FI’s cousin’s fiancé. I met FI’s cousin 3 weeks ago at another family wedding. Fiance hadn’t seen the cousin for more than 20 years. The fiancé never even introduced herself, as she was too busy texting somebody. We got a STD for their wedding last week and they are not invited to our wedding. The shower is taking place less than a week before our wedding. Should I attend? I don’t feel like I need to, since I really don’t know this person at all. After all, I thought a shower was for the couple’s closest friends and family? But, I’m wondering what you think?
Post # 3
I would send a small gift with my regrets. Don’t feel obligated to go, especially because you hardly know her.
Post # 4
Sounds like you were added to the wedding guest list after seeing them at the family event and you received a shower invite based on that. (There was a thread yesterday about how in many circles shower invites go to every female on the wedding guest list while bachelorette invites are sent only to the bride’s closest friends.)
I would definitely not feel obligated to go. As abbie07 said, sent a small gift and regrets.
Post # 5
I am hoping this doesn’t happen to me— I was told by my future Mother-In-Law who to invite to my shower even if I didn’t know them :/ I would expect maybe the bride was told you were family and to add you on the list? I would think regrets would be fine- esp so close to your own wedding!
Post # 6
Sending regrets would be fine. Maybe send a card and a small gift if you feel like it. I find it weird when showers are extended to everyone in the family/friends that haven’t seen each other in 20 years or haven’t met before.
Post # 7
showers are typically for close friends and family to “shower” the bride/couple with gifts. i don’t think you are obligated to go. send a nice card. you have enough expenses and things to do the week before your wedding
Post # 8
@sportsgal31: Yes, I also thought that we were received a STD as an afterthought because of the timing. I considered for a moment that it would be nice to invite them to our wedding, but we’re already over budget. I certainly didn’t think I’d receive a shower invitation.
A card is a nice idea.
Post # 9
I learned yesterday that showers are sometimes for every female invited to the wedding, so that could be why you got an invite. I wouldn’t go in your situation either since you barely know the girl.