(Closed) Aunt-in-law wants to throw me a shower, but I don’t have any friends….

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

aww, that’s kind of a bummer.  my advice is that you really shouldn’t invite anyone to a shower that you aren’t going to invite to the wedding (with the limited exception that your coworkers can choose to throw you a small shower at the office or at a restaurant or something without your feeling obligated to invite the whole office).  but why can’t you invite your friends who don’t live there anyway?  not everyone would be able to come, but i bet they’d love an excuse for a reunion. 

Post # 4
873 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

In my area we always invite people to the shower that aren’t invited to the wedding.  I can’t tell you how many 3rd cousin, coworker, or church people’s showers I’ve been invited to, but never went to the wedding.  This especially makes sense in your situation where you live in one place and are getting married in another.  I would definately invite your coworkers, and anyone else in your area – do you have neighbours or members of a religious community you belong to who you are semi-close with?  Also, does your FI’s family members and friends live where you are now?  I’ve often been at showers where the groom’s female friends come. 

As to the coed aspect, what about having a ‘modified’ shower.  If the guys don’t want to sit around drinking tea and playing shower games, what about making it a picnic/outdoor game shower or doing some sort of activity with a dinner or lunch at a restaurant instead (mini golf, bowling – I don’t know your tastes/what is available in your area)?  A lot of women (especially younger women) don’t really like the traditional shower format, so they might enjoy this kind of too. 

Post # 5
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

You don’t have to have a huge shower. I’ve been to showers with ten or twelve people before. I actually like the smaller showers because you have time to talk to everyone there. If your future aunt-in-law lives near you, aren’t there other family members that can come? I’d invite the few co-workers you are planning on inviting to the wedding. It doesn’t have to be all out, why not do something intimate and uniquely you? I think it’s awesome she’s offering. Maybe ask her who she’d invite?

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