Post # 1
Regular poster going anonymous. Some of my family knows I’m on here…
Six months ago, I lost my beloved grandmother. I was so close with her my entire life and to this day, I can’t think of her without tearing up. I miss her so, so much.
A couple days after she passed, my mom, aunt and I went over to my grandparents’ house to go through her personal belongings. I was a fly on the wall – I didn’t want to put pressure on anyone or seem like I’m there just to go after her things. I was simply there to help pack and move things.
My aunt and mom were going through her jewelry and my aunt insisted that my mom take her engagement ring and her wedding band. My mom was very surprised but gladly took them. My mom wears the wedding band on her necklace everyday and she gave my grandmother’s engagement ring to me. It is without a doubt my most treasured possession and I wear it everyday.
Now, six months later, my aunt is asking for the engagement ring. My mom told her she gave it to me and she bawled her eyes out. She said she wanted to get it resized so that she could wear it. My aunt hasn’t worn a single piece of jewelry in close to 20 years. My mom thinks she just wants to give it to her daughter, which I could totally see.
My mom offered her the wedding band, but she said no and insisted on the engagement ring.
Bees, I’m so torn on what to do. I absolutely realize it’s her mom, but I am so attached to this ring. If I gave it up to her, I know I would regret it for the rest of my life, especially since it would just go to her daughter.
Post # 3
its already been decided. your aunt gave your mom the rings.. . she cant ask for them back.
Post # 4
@asianyoushi: +1 she should take some other item, the ring is already yours
Post # 6
just because its her mother and your grandmother does it make it any less important to you than it is to her. Keep the ring, but explain to her that you’re sorry but it’s really sentimental to you and the only thing you have. show some sympathy, but she’ll have to get over it.
Post # 7
It is yours now, so I wouldn’t give it to your aunt.
Post # 8
Definitely agree, she freely gave it to you, can’t come back month’s later and ask for it,
Post # 9
It just breaks my heart that she’s so upset. I love my aunt so much, but she can be so frustrating. My mom several years ago let her borrow my great grandmother’s china and she never returned it. So now my aunts has BOTH sets of china, and my mom has none. My mom made me promise I wouldn’t give her the ring but I just feel really guilty 🙁
Post # 11
She shouldn’t have offered it if she didn’t mean it. It’s yours and you’re attached to it. I would keep it.
Post # 12
It means so much to you…why would you give it up? You love it and wear it to remember your grandmother. It would be different if you stuck it in a jewelry box. You have as much right to it as your aunt; especially since she gave it to your mom and has changed her mind. I don’t see how you deserve it less than your aunt’s daughter. Do what is in your heart, but it sounds like you shouldn’t feel guilty for keeping it.
Post # 13
I guess I just need some validation that I’m not being a heartless b****
Post # 14
Keep it. Your mom was being more than generous and very reasonable by offering the band, and if she doesn’t want that I think you’re probably right that she’s planning on giving it to someone else.
Post # 15
Your aunt has no more right to it than your mother does. The two of them decided that your mother should take it so now it’s hers to do with as she will, (give it to you.) At this point your aunt can’t ask for the ring “back” especially because it was never hers to begin with.
Post # 16
SHE gave up the ring, and your Mom gave it to you. It’s yours. I can tell you will treasure this and always have it as a reminder of your grandma. Don’t let her melodramatics ruin that for you.