(Closed) avoiding in laws cookout and husband is upset

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 15
Member
1521 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Wow, your in-laws are something else! I like the PPs suggestions. I’m just shaking my head here. In my extended family we have numerous allergies, several who are lactose intollerant or have other dietary restrictions. We always make sure that there is something for everyone to eat! That’s never a question.

Post # 16
Member
3307 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Just go and bring your own food. They’re not going to confiscate it lol. So far as not trusting yourself to stay away from the fried food, realize that it’s not worth umpteen trips to the bathroom!

Post # 17
Member
2620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: County courthouse

Fuck his parents!!! Bring your own food. If they can’t understand you have a medical condition…that’s their fault. And…your SO needs to grow a pair and defend you!!!

Post # 18
Member
1983 posts
Buzzing bee

Just bring something just for yourself. 

Post # 19
Member
2427 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: NJ

Yes, you bring your own food in case they don’t have anything you can eat. If they say anything just say “it’s a medical issue”. Who cares if they think it’s rude?

Post # 20
Member
4767 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

giley:  What?  How is this an issue? wow.

Would his parents really think it is less rude to not go at all becasue of the food than to bring your own?

Bring your own food and eat it and that way they don’t have to store it.  This situations seeems like someone is really trying to pick a fight.

Post # 21
Member
1229 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Hmm, in light of how unreasonable and rude his parents sound, I’d stay home from the cookout, too. And I’d tell my husband that the last thing I need to hear from him is that I’m ‘selfish’ for wanting to put my health before my in-laws fee-fees… but I suppose I’d also reassure him that of course I would attend future parties, just not this one since it is specifically a “cook-out”. Still, I think it’s troubling that your husband is pressuring you to compromise your health and face his parents’ rudeness and lack of empathy without any support.

Post # 22
Member
588 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

People need to respect dietary restrictions. I personally wouldn’t go. Sorry. Health is first. And secondly I don’t care who it is— no one is allowed to just treat you with disrespect and get away with it. I wouldn’t go. Especially after being made very uncomfortable previously. Better things to do!!!!!

Post # 23
Member
1219 posts
Bumble bee

If you don’t ask, they can’t say no.  Just do it.  They will get used to it eventually.

Glad you are feeling better!

Post # 24
Member
3169 posts
Sugar bee

I hope your husband supports you more in future. This should have been a non issue because they should clearly either happily accomodate a family member and guest or accept your brining your own food. They sound really annoying, OP. And also that does not sound like an enjoyable spread anyway with so healthy options. 

Post # 25
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Sorry, don’t have advice for how to deal with your in-laws. (My way of dealing with it would be to sit sipping water and sighing loudly and making passive-agressive statements about how hungry I was and making my Darling Husband feel like Sh!t for not backing me up)

But I wanted to pass this along…I started see ing Nutritionist and she told me about this great supplement-Great Lakes Collagen (in the green can). I used to be super constipated all the time…since I started adding this collagen powder into my morning smoothie and making Kate’s Miracle Hydrating drink that I sip all day–no constipation, even when I was pregnant. This stuff hardly has any taste and can be added to anything hot or cold. Below are some links about how it could help you with your IBS.

I order the stuff from Amazon.  

 

http://satisfyingeats.com/informational/12-reasons-you-should-be-eating-this-superfood/

 

http://kathy-steinemann.hubpages.com/hub/Gelatin-Could-It-Be-a-Cure-for-Irritable-Bowel-Syndrome

 

Post # 25
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

HelloBlondie:  wtf? What about her post made you think she was expecting them to bend over backwards? She would happily bring her own food! I can’t believe 6 people found that bs “helpful”. 

Post # 27
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

giley:  Congrats on a successful resolution! Best of luck with the healthy eating!

Post # 28
Member
1580 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

That is great! I’m so happy this came to a peaceful ending for you! Good luck with IBS and your new journey 🙂 

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