(Closed) AWOL Bridesmaids…What to do?

posted 10 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
1379 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

One bit of advice, though I know this probably isn’t what you were looking for — maybe you could ask someone else (like your mother, aunt, whoever it was that threw your shower) to stand with you. Not as a "just in case" but say that as you’ve gone thorugh all this planning and they have been such a big help and a good friend – you would love to have them stand there. They can wear whatever dress they were already planning on wearing and you can know that the person next to you really wants to be there.


As for the other two — I would send one last email, or leave one last voicemail,  just stating how much you still want them to eb a part of your big day, but as of right now you are counting them out unless you hear otherwise. It will just be a weight off your shoulders and make the next two weeks easier.


Good luck and enjoy your big day! 

Post # 4
12 posts
  • Wedding: May 2009

Seeing as the date is approaching, I would definitely call both of them.  I have to disagree with HumarockBride – you have already discussed the ‘out’ with one of them and she said she will be there. Take her at her word!


Approach the discussion saying how excited you are to see her and to have her standing up for you.  Maybe she is uncomfortable contacting you because she’s having difficulty finding a place to stay (for financial reasons or whatever).  Offer to help.  Try to keep calm, even if she gets agressive.

Post # 5
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

This is a sticky situation… so sorry.

Maybe you don’t need a bridal party at all?  You mentioned they could sit with everyone else (aka… be honored guests).  Are you planning to have groomsmen?  Would you mind having them sit out too? Since very little has been invested in both time and money, I don’t think the girls have much to be let down over.  You could just explain to everyone that you and your fiance decided to simplify the wedding plans — you would love to hang out with all of the friends before and during the wedding but the ceremony would only include the two of you.

There’s no rule that says you need a bridal party.  I wish I didn’t have one — it would have saved much drama and hurt feelings when people were reluctant to participate.  My friends who weren’t in the bridal party were more supportive and helpful during the wedding than my MOH (sister). 

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