(Closed) Baby Mama

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
687 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Isn’t there something he can do legally to see his daughter?  Sounds to me like this “baby mama” isn’t a good mother and maybe you and your Fiance should consider trying for full custody.  I know that’s a big task but if you truly feel this little girl would be better off with you guy then I think it’s the right thing to do. 

Post # 4
Member
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

You said they have joint custody? WHy cant he report her for not letting their daughter see your FI? ya’ll go to court and it’d be over with. Hopefully. It’ll take a while though.

Post # 5
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

The reality is that he has a child with this woman so she is going to be a part of your lives. This means that one way or the other the 3 of you have to figure a way around her craziness so that the child gets whats best for her. IF she really is not a good mother then he needs to go to court to get full custody. Also if they have joint custody then she cant just refuse to let him see the child. But in all of this the focus truly must be on what is best for the child.

Post # 7
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

So you take the court order to the police and say “it is my time with the child will you escort us to the propety to get the child.” It is very simple, if it is court ordered then he had the legal right to see the child. If it is not court ordered then he needs to get a court order.

Post # 10
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

Beware crazy b*****s.  My BIL is in jail b/c his baby mama lied to the cops, and juries nowadays default to guilty.  The justice system sucks.

Anyway my advice is to listen to your Fiance.  He knows she’s crazy.  Just leave her be until the daughter is old enough to understand.

Have him write her a letter every year on her birthday.  Keep them all to give to her once she’s 18.

Post # 11
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Wow!  I would try to do as you said – pay child support on time.  Send simple gifts or cards for holidays and birthdays each year.  How about writing her letters – even if you dont mail them or copy them before sent – so she can see later in life that you did care for her even when her bio mom made things rough.  Just write out what your feelings are and what you would say to her if you had her for your own.  As long as you think she’ll be decently taken care of maybe cut off all phone conversation to avoid screaming matches.  Or set up a time each week to call or when you legally use your joint custody agreement.

Post # 12
Member
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

@McConnell14: I would do exactly what mrskesslertobe said. I definately wouldnt just give up and be like oh well we can’t see her. If he really wants to see her then take the court order and report her.

Post # 13
Member
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Why doesn’t your Fiance get a police escort to pick up the child? Maybe a lawyer. Someone. My step-dad had a similar problem with his daughter whom he loved SO much. He tried to get custody of her, but that didn’t work even though there was a lot of bad stuff. She now is of age and doesn’t speak to her father a lot and he is a great man. Do not let your husband wait until she is old enough to make a decision because it will be too late. She’ll have poison her mother spews making her hate her father.

Post # 14
Member
2090 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Agree with Mrskesslertobe. If your fiancé has a court ordered custody agreement in place which she is violating, you should be calling the police to enforce the order. I don’t understand why you don’t want to call the police if she is the one in the wrong. Legally, she has to comply with the court order – and if the cops are there, I bet she will answer the door and comply. If you don’t want to involve the police, then I would go to the court in which your fiancé received the custody order and ask someone there about how to file for a violation of the custody agreement.

Post # 15
Member
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Honestly I would be calling up my lawyer and documenting all of these incidents, when he thinks you have enough reopen the custody case and go for sole custody. I’d worry that calling the cops would scare the girl more than anything and that will make it harder for you and her dad to reach out to her.

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