Post # 1
So my sister is about 4 months pregnant and I am not. My husband and I will start trying in a couple of months but have started to think about baby names. The sex of the baby is still unknown. My sister has always liked the name Isabel so when my husband said he liked Isabella for our baby girl I said no because of the similarity.
A couple months ago, she asked what names I liked for my future children. I said Liliana and Isabella (after thinking about how different Isabel/Isabella are I was okay with it). She said she liked Lilly and Isabel. She said they’re different so it wouldn’t matter.
Fast forward to yesterday, she asked again what names I like. Again, i said Lilliana and Isabella. She said she’s naming her daughter Lilliana Isabel. I said we had already talked about it a few months ago and that she had said she wanted Lilly Isabel. She didn’t accept my reminder and said her husband came up with the name months ago. Keep in mind, they still don’t know the sex of the baby. They’ll find out this week, though.
I went home and talked to husband and we agreed that we still would name our baby girl Lilliana or Isabella, regardless.
My sister and I aren’t close anymore. We had a falling out a couple years ago. We see each other once a week because she and her husband live with my parents and I visit my parents every weekend. We don’t really talk during the week so chances are our children will not grow up together.
We still don’t know the sex of her baby or what I’ll have but it’s kinda weird. Just looking for opinions or advice.
Post # 2
Sounds obnoxious on her part, but you did tell her you liked ‘her’ names as well. She’s probably thinking you’re trying to steal her names just as much as you think the opposite. Siblings at their best. I’d stop having the conversation at all and do what you want if and when the time comes, though it may get confusing for the rest of the family.
Post # 3
Whilst you can’t really ever call dibs on a name, especially if you aren’t pregnant it is weird she kept asking you and then has chosen to use what you had earmarked. I would personally refuse to discuss it further.
Post # 4
jazzyninja : don’t tell her your boy names! Calling dibs is a sure fire way to make sure someone uses a name you love.
Post # 5
You’re all family so your children will always be around each other, even if it’s just birthdays/holidays…their names will always be coming up amongst family, too. That being said, if she’ll name her daughter Lilliana Isabel, why not name yours Isabella Lillian/Lilly? Middle names hardly ever come up so there’ll basically just be a Lilliana and Isabella in the family, if you go that route.
That being said, don’t let this cause a rift, regardless. She doesn’t even know if she’s having a girl yet, and you don’t have ANY babies yet. Maybe neither of you will ever have girls?
Although I will say it was odd for your sister to ask which names you like if it clearly didn’t have much sway on her decisions (or did it? Maybe she wanted to spite you? That’d be a whole other topic…)
Post # 6
1) Stop discussing names with her
2) If/when you get pregnant, pick one of literally thousands of other beautiful names available in the world. Or…. name your potential baby exactly the same name as your sisters. Because that’s not petty at all.
Post # 7
She said she liked Lilly and Isabel a few months ago and that’s seems consistent with her saying now that they decided on Lilliana Isabel. Maybe I’m missing somethng?
I doubt she would choose a name she didn’t like for her child just to spite you, she probably doesn’t think it’s a big deal that you guys like similar names since the kids will have little to do with one another. My opinion would be to name your own future kid whatever you want and move on.
Post # 8
- Wedding: September 2012 - Southern California
I mean, the names you two were discussing were already so similar, I don’t see much difference honestly. You’re not even TTC yet and for all you know, you may end up with a boy once you do so all of this will be a moot point.
On a side note, I’m thoroughly impressed when people have already decided on their baby’s name so early in the process. I’m literally due any day now and we still haven’t finalized a name yet. It’s been so hard for us! We’re hoping at this point that once we see him, one of our contenders will look like him or the name gods will speak to us or something haha.
Post # 9
TheGridMonster : Agreed. If she likes Lilly and Isabel, they put both together. Maybe they want Lilly to be a nickname?
And I also agree with the other PP that you should never call dibs on a name. Once we had a really good girl’s name (Team Green, so never knew the sex until birth), I kept my mouth shut. Sure enough, we had a girl, and no one took the name because they would have never thought of it.
Post # 10
- Wedding: September 2019 - City, State
Why are you stressing about it now? They won’t know the sex of the baby until next week. And if it’s not a girl your stressing for nothing.
Post # 11
My mom has 3 siblings. All three siblings have a child and used the same name. It wasn’t confusing in the slightest.
I’ll never understand the “stealing a name” thing.
Name your kid whatever the f you want.
Post # 12
Isobel/ Isabella are not different- theyre pretty much the same names. Your sister liked Isabel so if she had a baby first then you could never use it.
I have a Lucia in my family so that means I cant use Lucy. Or we’ve got a Sophie so no Sophia. It’s just life.
Whatever name she uses as a middle name, you can still use.
Post # 13
Do not discuss baby names with your sister. And Lilly/Lilliana are essentially the same name. It was you who first told her that you might be using one of the names she chose, now she’s done the same thing. One of you is no better than the other.
And while this doesn’t always happen, choosing a name when you are pregnant can lead to VERY different choices from what you thought you would choose. Dh and I had names chosen and neither of us like them when it actually came time to name a baby. Worrying about it now is completely pointless.
Post # 14
My friend shares a name with her cousin. It was their great grandmother’s name, Katherine. My friend goes by Katie and the younger one is Katherine. She loved her “namesake” when we were younger.
Post # 15
It’s too late for you now, but this is why we are not sharing our baby names with many people prior to the birth of the child. I am 5 months pregnant and just found out we are having a boy, but only my mom and Mother-In-Law know our name options and we don’t plan on telling anyone else until he is here and we have a birth certificate ready. We also have a girl name secure for our next one if it is a girl, and only 2 people know this as well. Not anyone’s business until the baby is born and a birth certificate is signed, and then you are the one with the name printed and no one else can take it at that point.