Post # 1
This may be a first! So Fi isn’t comfortable designating a best man – he has two brothers hes close to, and another best friend and can’t pick anyone to be “above” the other. I am worried because of that he won’t get a bachelor party since he isn’t very clear with people’s jobs etc. Did anyone else have this happen to their Fi? He deserves a night to be celebrated, and if I could, I would throw the party for him and deligate to his brothers what they need to do, but that seems a bit much and controlling so I’ll withold. He hasn’t mentioned not having one makes him sad, but knowing his personality he would really like a day of golf with his friends. Is there ANYTHING I can do to help get a bachelor party rolling?
Post # 2
A best man isn’t required to throw a bachelor party. Anyone (except you), including people not in the wedding party at all, can offer to throw a bachelor party. So if his brothers and/or best friend are interested in doing that, they will offer regardless of what their official title is. There is nothing for you to do and you really shouldn’t be doing anything. If he’s as close to these individuals as you say he is, I’m sure they’ll want to do something for him (whether it’s a bachelor party proper or just hanging out doing fun stuff) anyway. This situation really isn’t as uncommon as you seem to think it is, but it is definitely not your circus to handle.
Post # 3
annabananabee : thanks! I guess men are more last minute planning than women. I’ll keep on staying out of it!
Post # 4
bluebee19 : No. I know your heart is in the right place, but this isn’t yours. Give his brothers and friends a chance to step up. If they do, awesome. If they don’t, not your fault and not yours to fix. Tons of people survive without bachelor parties. It would be controlling to try to make it happen.
Post # 5
Darling Husband also couldn’t choose a best man, so he just had 3 groomsmen. They all got together and planned him a bachelor party.
It is not exclusively the role of the best man to throw a bachelor party – the groomsmen or even a friend not in the bridal party can step up and plan one. Honestly, I would just let it go. Give his brothers and best friend a chance to plan something. If they do, great. If they don’t, it’s not the end of the world. Bachelor and bachelorette parties are not a requirement of getting married.
Post # 6
you can throw your own, is not a gift giving event or even an honor party but rather a get together of people and in the UK about 50% of people organise their own… I dont know about america but here a lot of people are too OCD to let other people organise things lol
Post # 7
Unless hes paying them, there are no ‘jobs’ ugh. Bridesmaid or Best Man isnt somehow responsible for throwing a party, anyone can, and probably will offer.