Post # 62
I’m against them when someone is committed to someone else. I think it’s stupid, my fianace said it’s just funny more than anything. I still think it’s wrong to have some other woman all up on your guy, touching, grinding, getting naked. It makes me sick and uneasy…I would rather there not be any strippers but I feel like I have no say in it. He doesn’t truely respect my feeling on it, he used to, so I thought but now he acts like ‘its a bachelor party’ it HAS to have naked women and lap dances. his best man tried to say Vegas, NO WAY is that happening. And I feel like 75% of the groomsmen won’t respect me wishes for that day, so I’m screwed. Cause I’m just a prude woman wh won’t be there anyways, right?
Post # 63
I’m jealous of your man, for him to say that!
Post # 64
I don’t like the idea of strippers or anything of the sort. He knows and respects that, and doesn’t have a desire to do anything like that. I am very happy with myself and with us, and I trust him- I am just morally against the idea of strippers, in any sort- male or female.
Post # 65
I don’t think it’s ever appropriate for my SO to ogle women in different stages of undress, and have them grind on him etc. Doing it because you are about to get married? Not in this relationship. No strippers for sure.
I don’t care about porn, and those women are naked, but it’s different because they’re not there in the same room.
My SO isn’t interested in strippers anyway.
Post # 66
It all comes down to how much you trust him. For my husband’s bachelor party, I trusted that he wouldn’t do anything I wouldn’t want him to do. In turn, he got to marry a woman who trusts him and does not want to impede on his freedom. So it was a win-win for us.
And I’m fine with him going to strip clubs for his friend’s bachelor parties because if I weren’t – just how hypocritical would that be?
Post # 67
I don’t think it does have much to do with trusting a man. Men do cheat sometimes. Why dangle temptation right in front of his face while he’s drunk and being influenced by his friends? It doesn’t make sense to me. It;s like you’re setting him up for failure, in a way. Nobody is infallible. You can’t guarantee someone would never, ever, EVER cheat. Maybe his breaking point would be being drunk, surrounded by friends who are engaging in trashy behavior, and having a naked woman who is fixated on him and hoping to help him part with more of his money.
Maybe my SO is old fashioned, but he thinks having strippers is disrespectful to your spouse, Also, he wouldn’t want me around naked men, so it goes both ways. No naked women for him; no naked men for me.
Post # 68
- Wedding: May 2013 - Pavilion overlooking golf course scenery, reception at banquet hall
I don’t really care. She’s in it for the money, he’s in it for the boobs, neither want an emotional connection – that’s all mine – so as long as each party treats the other with respect (but still have fun) I don’t care.
I guess I’m lucky that Fiance doesn’t like them anyway. In his words, “I’d feel so guilty for her the whole time. Like – I’m sorry, you really don’t have to do this.” – LOL!
Post # 69
Well any men in favor of having a stripper for a bachelor party should be elated at the idea of his finacee stripping in front of an all male audience for tips (you know to help pay for the catering, floral arrangements, etc! and besides, it would be her one last hurrah! So if your man comes to you asking that strippers be allowed, let him know that he is free to do what he will and that you will also be showing your good as it would be the last night to have a bunch of men oggle your beautiful form on stage. Then wait for his reaction 🙂
Post # 70
I’m not okay with strippers right now, but I’m trying to be. I trust my Fiance implicitly. I think I’m going to ask him to take me to the strippers in the coming months so I can see what it’s like. I want to be comfortable with him going with the guidance of my ‘hard limits’.
Plus, in my city the strippers aren’t that good looking and skilled so there’s not a lot to worry about! Vegas would be a whole nother story!
Another thing that is reassuring to me is that I trust and respect his friends. I am also close friends with them and know that they respect me and our relationship and will be doing as much as my Fiance would be to make sure everyone is behaving well!
Post # 71
I re-fing-fuse for my fiance to have strippers or any females of any sort at his. He knows this I would go balistic! There is ZERO need for a man or woman in a commited relationship soon to be married to do that. If you aren’t doing it while dating/engaged why is it suddenly ok for one night/weekend to cheat or be a sleazy skank. Grounds for the end, no thank you I didn’t sign up for someone who does something like that. For me it isn’t about trust, its about respect.
Post # 72
Despite my other huge thread bitching about a bachelor party, I’m not opposed to the strippers. As long as they’re just seen as fun/funny, not a way to try to get the groom to cheat on the bride or to “spite” her.
Post # 73
I definitely can see this POV as well 🙂
Post # 74
- Wedding: September 2019 - City, State
When did the tradition start….Humnn..that echoed in my brain like the beginning of a flashback on a soap opera! So I went and looked up the history of bachelor parties.
According to Time Magazine, they began as early as the 5th century BC with the Spartans having dinner’s in celebration of the groom. Then–
“In 1896, a stag party thrown by Herbert Barnum Seeley — a grandson of P.T. Barnum — for his brother was raided by police after rumors circulated that a famous belly dancer would be performing nude. Before his wedding to Gloria Hatrick, Jimmy Stewart’s infamous bash at the Beverly Hills hangout Chasen’s included midgets popping out of a serving dish.”
Read more: http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1904885,00.html#ixzz29JXmjsQ5
Very interesting. Thanks for the question that sparked my interest!
Post # 75
- Wedding: September 2019 - City, State
In my state, we have a co-ed strip club. (at least I think it’s still open) So maybe that’s the answer. They don’t sell drinks; it’s byob.
This other article I read blames modern bachelor parties on the 1960’s, birth control and playboy.
Do they mean the pill because I heard that condoms have been around for a long time, since Egyptians. Here’s an article with pictures of a condom made out of animal intestines. They said these were reused. Ew.
I didn’t know how I was going to approach or feel about my FI’s bachelor party, but he says he doesn’t even want to bother with it. I was surprised, but relieved. Wonder if it’ll stay that way? I gotta a friend who actually is salivating at the idea of taking Fiance out for a stripper night on the town. I actually think it will be more for my friend than my FI!
Post # 76
I thought I didn’t have a problem with my FH at strip clubs until we went to a joint bachelorette party for my friends. He went off with one bride and her female/male friends, I went with the other bride and her party.
We both ended up at strip clubs and both got lapdances. Up until then, my FH hated strip clubs, I used to love them and love strippers (I am obviously into women as well).
Turns out when my FH said he got a lapdance, I was like wha?!?! It totally hurt my feelings and I told him it hurt my feelings. He apologized and the truth is, I did encourage him to get a lap dance. So, what ever, I got over it.
The funny part was when, I was like jokingly yelling: you had someone’s butt in your face, and he’s like- omg, you did too! LOL