Post # 1
First a little backstory – for our dinner we are having just family, the bridal party, and close friends due to space and budget limitations for the dinner. A lot of our other friends are coming just to the wedding ceremony and then the reception part later that night. We are having beer/soda/wine all night and some hors d’oeuvres later on.
Okay, onto my question…
My fiance finally sat down and came up with a guest list for his bachelor party. His groomsmen and him are going golfing during the day and then meeting with everyone else at our local fave bar.
As I was writing down who he wanted, I noticed that he wanted to invite guys that aren’t even invited to the whole wedding. I said “Honey, I’m not sure you should do that… its not proper etiquette.” He asked if they could come to just the reception and not the dinner like some of our other friends.
Is it okay for him to do that if they guys he’s inviting are invited to our reception? Because for him it’s just a “boys night out” and not a special bachelor type party.
I’m not sure what to tell him?! Help!
Post # 3
You are right that the groom should not invite someone to the bachelor party who is not invited to the wedding.
But I’m a little confused about your wedding.
So you are having the ceremony where everyone is invited? then the close family and friends will eat dinner and everyone else will presumably eat on their own, then everyone gets back together for the cocktail reception?
Post # 4
Although most people probably don’t agree with me, I have no issue with people going to the bachelor (ette) parties that are not invited to the wedding-or in this case-the whole wedding. However, I did not invite people to our parties. They were put together for us. I have gone on bachelorette parties for people who I was friends with but due to their budget restraints or the location, I was unable to go. I still wanted to celebrate with them because they were my friends and I was happy for them.
I think that if you are that worried about etiquette you should reconsider only inviting some of your guests to dinner. While I understand why people do it, I think that is a much bigger etiquette no-no.
Post # 5
@Zusie: Sorry for confusion. I mispoke – I wrote the post in such a rush! Ceremony and dinner are for family and family friends. They’ll eat dinner and then when the dance part starts – our other friends are coming to that for beer/wine/soda and hors d’oeuvres.. their invites are “Best Wishes Only” My Fiance wanted to know if he can invite those just coming to the reception to his bachelor party.
Post # 6
@jvanders623: Its funny you are asking this, because my Fiance just told me the same thing, and I was like you can’t do that! But i talked to a few people about it… and they said no biggie at all, because guys love to go out and party. They said its not the same as us girls inviting people to our bach, idk why its a double standard… LOL
Post # 7
@Lovemyfuturehub: Exactly! And the guys he wants to invite to the bachelor party would much rather come and drink free beer at just the reception than be invited to the whole “boring” part.. (which is their opinion)