- 4 years ago
- Wedding: December 2014
Regular poster going anon.
Bees, I’m having a hard time with the bachelor party Future Brother-In-Law is planning for Fiance. Yes, part of this is going to be a ‘there’s strippers’ vent – but if you have the patience to get through this post, hear me out.
A little bit about Fiance, he is not the type of guy who enjoys going to strip clubs. I’m sure a lot of you are rolling your eyes and thinking, ‘suuuuure, gullible girl’, but it’s the truth as I know it to be. We have discussed it before and he has told me that he has gone with guys but it would never be his first choice to go to one. Yes, I believe him. He’s a very family-orientated, anti-cheating or anything that could be remotely considered cheating, man. I never have had any reason to doubt him or not trust him.
This weekend we were hanging out with FI’s brother, his best man. He told us what he was planning for FI’s bachelor party. He has decided to have it at a friends house and to have a black tie ‘gentlemans’ club’ type evening. Tuxes, cigars, poker, women in lingerie, etc. He said (quoting), ‘this way when we have strippers it will be classier than if we went to a strip club’. He also made a comment about having enough time between the bachelor party and the wedding so Fiance would ‘have enough time to forget the names of the women who’s titties were shaking in his face’.
So, I have a couple issues with this. The first and obvious one is the strippers… yes, I’m being that girl. Future Brother-In-Law is trying to tell me that strippers who do house calls are classier than strippers in a strip club? Um, I call BS. Take Fiance to a strip club, fine, but don’t hire some girl to grind him while he is in a private home. I’m probably going to get flamed for this, but I just think it’s nasty. No, I don’t think that Fiance will cheat on me. Yes, I think it will be raunchier than if they went to a strip club, and while I trust Fiance I do not trust some of his friends. I just have a feeling that if this happens then there will be lots of drama from the bachelor party.
My biggest irritation, though, is that Future Brother-In-Law is not thinking of Fiance at all. Fiance has said, many times, that what he wants to do is ‘ride dirt bikes and shoot guns with my boys’ for his bachelor party. Fiance and his friends are NOT they type of guys to get dressed up, willingly, and go to a fancy party. None of them own tuxes let alone have the desire to put one on. They already have to rent suits for the wedding and I doubt they are going to be thrilled to find out they have to rent a tux for the bachelor party, too. I just wish that the party planned really was for Fiance and what he wanted, not what seems to be FBIL’s dream bachelor party. I asked Fiance after his brother was talking about the party what he though and he pretty much said what I was thinking, that it doesn’t sound like something he and his friends would really enjoy. I feel lucky that my Maid/Matron of Honor asked my what type of party I want and is planning something she knows I will really love. I wish Fiance had the same.
I guess my question is – should I say something to FBIL? I’m afraid that if I bring up the second part, about how the party is not something Fiance will really enjoy, that he will think I’m making a stink because of the strippers. Yeah, I’m not thrilled about the strippers and that is something I would like to see not happen, but I also really want Fiance to have an amazing bachelor party. (FBIL is also the type of person who would lie to me and say that there will be no strippers and have them anyway)
Sorry this is so long, I just needed to vent. What would you guys do?