(Closed) Bachelor Party Woes

posted 12 years ago in Parties
Post # 167
127 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

If it was my friend, I would tell her and I would hope that she would do the same for me. This girl is no doubt there to entertain her Fiance and there is no way that I would not tell my friend! This girl is skanky and trying to make a fool out of your friend. Your friend’s Fiance probably don’t know about the girl being there, but that would be one party that wouldn’t take place if he was my FH and I knew about all this beforehand! If she is your friend, tell her! If you don’t and she finds out that you knew about this, she would be embarrassed and hurt that you, the guys, the skank and her Fiance all knew about this and she didn’t. I just feel that it’s going to come out eventually because a vindictive woman is involved! If you talk to the guys and they still go through with it, and then one day it comes out…. what if one of the guys say that you knew all along. Or, what if this girl starts to do under-handed stuff like try to become good friends with her just to be around the Fiance…. wouldn’t you feel obligated to tell her that she is not one to be close friends with because she probably slept with her husband at his B-party?

Post # 169
475 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

You know, this may sound bad but I second the motion of maybe NOT wanting my Fiance to go through with his bachelor party UNLESS something was resolved ASAP, meaning that he better have a talkin to his GMs. I mean, he is marrying your friend, not his GMs and its about being there for each other and compromise, etc. I just honestly dont think this is acceptable what the GMs are doing AND its horrible how they are acting. I would be LIVID and I hate that they are not only creating unnecessary drama, they are potentially causing drama bt the bride and groom bc itll be his friends against her and that puts him in a bad situation.

Geez, this just pisses me off ha! I think you so should say something to the female friend, little b***h! It sounds like she likes being the only girl with those guys and doesnt mind the drama/attention at the expense of someone else and good grief, after 7 yrs and she hasnt made ANY real attempt to get to bride?! Yea, shes no real friend of the groom and super fake, I hope after all this the groom realizes what kind of friends he  has and maybe distances himself from them or at the very least, realizes that his wife comes first and doesnt play into their actions.

This really sucks but you know, my Fiance has a couple friends that would pull crap like this and this is what I’ve been dreading…ughhh!

Post # 170
414 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

@mrsmurraytobe I know right? She’s annoying me too and I have no idea who she is! It’s fine for girls to have lots of guy friends (I am one of them!) but I hate when it comes along with the attitude “oh I just can’t get along with girls! They are so bitchy lolz!” Come on, girl.

Post # 171
44 posts
  • Wedding: August 2011

oh man, I’ve been following this from the beginning, and I’m still so stunned at the situation!  I’d feel like the Fiance is really not doing enough in this situation.  I realize that it’s his bachelor party and so everything is purposely being kept from him – but as soon as he heard about FF joining them he should have stepped up a LOT more than he did.  I don’t know whether he just ‘doesn’t get it’, or doesn’t want/mind the drama, but come on!  This is the time to show everyone (friends, FF, and espeically the bride-to-be) whose side he’s on. 


You’ve really been handling the situation well here Adira – she should be honored to have a friend (and MOH) like you!  Just out of curiosity, have you thought of asking your husband to have a ‘chat’ with the guys?  Maybe hearing it from ‘one of their own’ would be a lot more persuasive than from you.  Also, I’m stunned at how rude Groomsmen1 has been to you throughout this whole thing!! I bet after all of this, the bride doesn’t particularly want Groomsmen1 or this FF slut present at her wedding.  Poor girl…


Please do keep us posted 🙂 and keep up the good work!!

Post # 172
475 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Ha right @edina, I feel so personally involved!!

Im one of those girls that has a lot of guy friends and love hanging out with the guys but I know the limits and boundaries and I would NEVER even entertain the thought that it would be ok to be the only girl (who is not the stripper) and attend the bachelor party and unRSVP from the bridal shower to do it, especially when the friend and the bride arent comfy or friendly. B***h!!

Shes a big girl and knows what shes doing, shes being super fake and really, really rude, not to mention acting slutty and attention seeking, at the expense of the bride. I hope the groom realizes and sees all of their true colors and sides with his wife to be.

I’m sorry but at the very least, this girl needs to go…

Post # 174
1830 posts
Buzzing bee

So I agree that the groomsmen are being horrible and this girl has pissed me off from the first post of yours. 

But….I have to admit I do have a friend who used to be like this.  Who even if she’d never been attracted to guy friend still would be almost competitive or constantly have to flaunt how close of a friend she was to the guy, even in front of the girl.  When a few of the guys were forbidden to talk to her, usually after a temper tantrum on my friends part where she’d heavily insult the gf to the guy behind the girls back because the gf put some restrictions on their interaction, she started to change.  A few of her guy friends she’s now much more close to their wives and everyone is happy. 

My friend is great in so many ways but this was one aspect of her that used to make me cringe and I have no idea why she did it (she’s can be at times a possessive friend even with girls I guess), but even when I and one of her other friends tried to talk sense into her and express how horrible she was to these guys girlfriends she just wouldn’t change for the a looooooong time.  She just was a very domineering, posessive friend and had a hard time letting that go.  I’m making her sound horrible but she really is a terrific friend, we all have bad traits and this was very much hers.

Post # 176
25 posts
  • Wedding: October 2011

Unfriending you on facebook???? I mean seriously?? He is more immature than I thought! He needs to reign in his temper and chill out. I know lots of people of said this…but this is getting more and more fishy…

His “friendship”=SO NOT WORTH IT.


@mrsmurraytobe- I’m with you 100%! The Groom needs to “wake up” and side with his Bride…


Post # 177
767 posts
Busy bee

Whoa, I think this thread has gone a little… extreme.  I’m pretty suprised to see this on weddingbee.

A girl who hangs out with a bunch of guys is a slut?  Is this the 1950s?  Comments that she was sure to have slept with the groom at the party?  Uh, what about the assumption here that all these committed men are total sluts?  With no moral code?

How does the whole idea of “I trust him, I don’t trust her” work?  Is she going to rape him?  If rape is off the table than nothing is going to happen as long as he is faithful.  If he isn’t faithful nothing will stop him from sleeping with others.

I agree that the girl shouldn’t have been invited and shouldn’t have gone given the history here but to say she’s a terrible person and a slut based on her trust that these guys wouldn’t rape her and thus she could be confident that nothing she didn’t want would happen at a party with her friends?  Okay… She’s a terrible terrible person for prefering to hang out with her friend rather than her friend’s SO? 

I think the drama here has been fed by both sides and it’s past time to let it die down. 

I still don’t get the logic behind going to the bride before the groomsmen had a chance to do so, you could always have corrected the record after the fact and IMO it was gauranteed to make the groomsmen dislike you for very very long time. 

Post # 179
8246 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Wow …. I just finished reading this entire string.  This whole situation just seems like a mess and I’m glad I’m not in the middle of it.  @Adira – I think you’ve done a wonderful job handling the situation and the bride is lucky to have you standing up for her (since her Fiance doesn’t seem to be fully supporting her feelings regarding FF).

The groomsmen just seem to be completely immature and rude.  And come on – defriending you on Facebook?!  Are we in middle school here?  Hopefully they can stick to their word and uninvite FF from the bachelor party.

Post # 180
1369 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@adira, so did bride get confirmation of what the actual bachelor party plans are going to be?

and @arachna, i highly agree with you that labeling the FF a “Slut” is a bit extreme. it’s the principle of where her priorities that are not normal… but it doesn’t go as far as FF trying to rape groom. i think that’s a mix of “we don’t know the whole story about FF&groom’s friendship + bride’s insecurities about bach party wknd”…


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