- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2011
I had my bachelorette party last night and I am still so angry I need to vent. I apologise in advance, as I imagine this will be long.
I never expected to have a bachelorette party. I have no bridesmaids, and only 2 girls who are coming to the wedding who live within around 1000km from me. Fiance and I were both fine with this as we both thought they are generally a bit silly, as us getting married certainly won’t stop us being able to go out with our friends, and we haven’t considered ourselves as single in a very long time.
My only friend who lives in the same town as me decided to throw me a party. I was happy not to have one, and was a bit wary about the whole situation, as it would only be her friends, as I had no one else nearby to ask. She convinced me that she knows me better than almost anyone (she does) and would only do things she knows I would like. She asked if I had any requests, and other than saying in no uncertain terms, absolutely no strippers, which I presumed would be a given, I trusted her to give me a good night.
Fast forward to last night. We are all at her house, when they all suddenly sit me down, which makes me very nervous. Then the sirens started. And in walks a “fireman”. I was completely in shock.
He comes over and tries to grab me to make me get up and dance with him. He tries to make me rub oil on him. He then tries to get me down on all fours so he can ride me. I refuse to do all to these things but refuses to take no for an answer. He is pushy and I am uncomfortable, and eventually I burst into tears and have to run outside.
I could not believe my friend had done the ONE thing I specifically said I did not want. I can see no situation where that this would be at all appropriate for any woman in a relationship. The things he did were disgusting, most of which happened long after I had removed myself, but I was kindly told all about it and shown photos.
- Very dirty dancing with girls
- He rode girls around whipping them
- He had girls lay on the floor while he rubbed his bits in their face. I saw numerous photos of his nuts on foreheads.
- He stuck his head into girls laps
- He had girls touch him all over
- He simulated the 69 position with girls
- He simulated sex including full on rubbing and touching
- He handcuffed girls and rubbed himself all over them
I’m sure there was more but I thankfully missed it.
When did this kind of thing become acceptable for someone who is about to get married?! I was (and still am) absolutely repulsed by all of this. Every other girls there was also in a relatioinship, and apparently I’m the only one who saw something wrong with this.
I’m angry because she did this even though she knew it was the last thing I wanted.
I’m angry because she didn’t give me the choice about whether or not I want to put myself in this situation.
I’m angry because she was so disrespectful to my Fiance and our relationship to think that this would be ok. And Fiance is angry at her lack of respect for our relationship (thankfully not angry at me). And why would we want someone who has such little respect for our relationship and the boundaries we have mutually decided on, as a guest at our wedding.
Now I am less than a week away from my wedding and instead of it being the happiest time of my life I am fuming with anger and considering telling my friend I don’t want her to come to the wedding. I told her from the start that if she got a stripper for me, I would uninvite her, and apparently she thought I was joking.
Maybe I’m just a prude? Do you think this is acceptable for someone who is about to get married?