(Closed) bachelorette party vs. bridal shower?

posted 7 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

Your maid of honor is incorrect. The bridal shower is the more tame of the two, and yes, that is where you get the “domestic” gifts. The bachelorette party is for the other stuff because moms and grandmas don’t typically attend those.

Post # 4
Member
6824 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Bridal shower doesn’t have to be “wifey” as you put it presents, it can be whatever you registered for.  The bridal shower is usually family, your bridal party for women and friends who “shower you” with gifts.

The bach party is usually you and your bridal party and girl friends celebrating getting married, this is ususally where the ranchy gifts should come in.

Post # 5
Member
4583 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’ve never heard of gifts being opened at a bachelorette. It’s more about just going out and having a good time with your besties.

Some bridal showers are “lingerie showers” and some are for the domestic gifts. It all depends on the type shower you/your Maid/Matron of Honor want.

Post # 6
Member
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

You’re right. Bridal showers are for all the “home goods” (basically whatever is on your registry) and the bachelorette party is for the younger crowd to go out and get wild! Definitely not a grandma affair. Typically you don’t even need to bring gifts to the bachelorette party, but if you do, it’s strictly sex-y type stuff, lingerie, sex toys, whatever. What did your Maid/Matron of Honor think it was for?

Post # 8
Member
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think most people have both. I’ve been to lingerie showers that were part of the bachelorette party, but only close friends were invited. (The typical bachelorette party festivities followed, but it doubled as a showes so the friends wouldn’t have to travel twice.)

As others have said, normally a shower is more domestic, but it depends on the audience. If your Maid/Matron of Honor wants to throw a lingerie shower, that’s up to her. Just ask that she not invite people you’d be uncomfortable seeing you open it. The thing with a shower is, everything is technically up to the person throwing it (though they should seek your input on the guest list.) So, if she wants to throw a lingerie party, she can. You can tell her you’d rather not have one, but you can’t insist that it be more tame.

That said, your aunt/mother/family friend can throw an additional shower.

Many brides have multiple showers AND a bachelorette party. But it just depends on who offers to throw you parties!

Post # 9
Member
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@Heatherloveskenny: My advice is to give her one of the many books or blogs for planning a wedding and show her what is written about bridal showers. Hopefully seeing it in written form will get her off your back! I had to show my mom actual photos of women wearing colored shoes before she believed that it wasn’t some crazy weird idea.

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