Post # 1
i was wondering if having a bachelorette party or a bridal shower is something every brides need to have..
unfortunately my Maid/Matron of Honor, my sister, and my mom live in Florida and im not expecting them to organize anything for me, considerating that they have no money and they wont be able to fly to boston not until the wedding..so why pay and organize something if they wont be able to be here? right? one of my bridemaids lives in Fl as well.. an other one is 16 and my last one just moved to Boston..the girl in boston wants to do something for me so badly, but we dont have any friends in common since we work different jobs..there are 2 people only that i know, but they are mostly her friends and they are not invited to the wedding so how akward will be having my bachelorette party with her and her 2 friends?!?lol i dont have many friends either since i moved here about 2 years ago.. i have few friends at work but that’s it! not that i really care, but when people ask me what i am doing for my bachelorette party and i answer simply “nothing” they are like”oh no, you should have something”! HOW?!??! at this point i will throw myself my own bachelorette party, but this is not the way it is supposed to be… the girls at work said they will do something for me, but i have my doubts…
i believe my FI’s mom will throw me a bridal shower, but she doesnt have too, i dont realy care anyways..she has been so helpful and i really dont feel like she should take care of this too…
im ok with not having neither of them, but i feel like i am not enjoying this whole experience as the other brides…and it kinda upsets me because i wish i had my family closer and do all those fun things every bride do….:(
Post # 3
We arent! I am having a shower but we decided to just have a night out with our bridal party and their significant others…
Post # 4
My friend lives in Philly now and all her family are all over the country. The wedding is in Seatlle. So we are planning to do something with her the first night we get to Seattle for the wedding. It will only be me, her, and her two sisters. But we just wanted to do something for her since she’s not getting to have showers, etc. You might see if you’re friend would be interested in hosting the bridesmaid luncheon the day of the wedding or something like that.
Post # 5
i assume we will be going out all together the night of the rehearsel dinner, BUT it is not the same thing.. my Fiance is going for his bachelor party next weekend (home alone with the cats, how nice?like an old cat lady) so this kida upsets me… then the girl who lives in florida is getting married in april and she just had her bridal shower and it kinda makes me jealous cause she is having a perfect traditional wedding…UGH!
Post # 6
I had a shower, but I had to go back to my hometown to do it because my mom and sister organized it for me, but couldn’t afford to travel here. I was happy to make the trip because we got married near them, and made a weekend out of visiting vendors and stuff.
BUT, we didn’t have b/ette parties. They weren’t our thing at all, and we just didn’t find it necessary. Not to mention our wedding party was all out of town anyway. I also made it clear from the beginning that I didn’t want anyone to organize those parties for us, and no one was surprised. Seriously not our thing.
I’ve never regretted that decision and I never felt like I was missing out on anything.
Post # 7
I didn’t have either. Honestly, I was a little sad for me that I couldn’t but it wasn’t really something I could justify flying a bunch of people out for.
Post # 8
@ miss chapstick!! yeah i dont feel the need to do it, but i feel pushed to have one because everyone tells me i should have one! a crazy bachelorette party is not really for me, i rather do something nice and quite since we also have a 16y/o in the bridal party…but it is not going to happen..
i just feel my Fiance has to have one..he is killing his butt off between work and school and helping me out with the wedding, plus he has to hear me everyday bitching about something cause apperantly i LOVE TO COMPLAIN LOL so he deserves one..
Post # 9
@missasb–yeah i cant force my mom and sis to fly over here when they cant because of money and time… and i cant really fly down there either cause im using all my vaca for the honeymoon and i really dont want to mess up with work situation….
Post # 10
I’m in a very similar situation. I live in Seattle now but all of my people are on the other side of the country. If I were to have a bachelorette and shower here, it would be me and my best friend (thank God she at least lives here) and a handful of women I enjoy hanging out with but who really aren’t my close, old friends at all. I mean, how could I have a bridal shower without my mom and Future Mother-In-Law there? So my solution was to fly out to their side of the country for one weekend, two months before the wedding. Hopefully the best friend will be able to make the trip too. Otherwise I would have been asking 5-10 people to fly out here for a weekend, and that makes a lot less sense. If that isn’t an option for you, then there are a lot of really nice but low-key alternatives, like you and the girls could go out after the rehearsal dinner together, or do something when they all arrive in town a few days before the wedding. Most of all, I’d advise you not to stress about it, let other people plan this stuff for you, and if it doesn’t end up coming together, then just let it go. It doesn’t sound like you’re that hung up on having a big bachelorette anyway.
Post # 11
I’m in a similar situation between people living all over and most of my friends are crazy stressed out trying to graduate PhD students locally. It does not really bother me to not have one at this point. My Fiance and I wanted a simple wedding and are trying to keep it that way. FI is having a tough time with the thought of a registry and we have already told a number of people locally that we are not going to be able to invite everyone. If they want to have a bbq or day on the lake sometime later in the summer to celebrate, great but if not that is ok.
My advice is to go what fits you and your situation. If that means you take some time a day or two before the wedding or you just go pamper yourself the evening of your FI’s bachelor party.