Post # 1

Member
208 posts
Helper bee
Long story short, met SO in person in May, SO joined fire department in NM. Got laid off in August. SO found place to live here in NC in exchange for work that wasn’t paid. SO’s Landlady was a you know what and treated him terribly, forcing him to go live with his grandparents in SC four hours away until he can get a good job. Now we’re sort of back where we started as far as distance which literally stinks. I mean I know he’s only four hours away but it’s not like I can see him anytime i want anymore. His grandparents haven’t seen him since he was 10 so they’re making up for lost time. I became so used to seeing him more frequently when he lived here that i literally haven’t slept restfully at all since he moved. SO knows we’re dying to get married but can’t til he can get a job to support us. Economy literally stinks as far as finding jobs so it is unpredictable when we’ll see each other more. I’m looking and looking for jobs for him. Because of this dumb economy, SOis considering joining the national guard because of the benefits of the job and because he has thought about it constantly which still unnerves me. I feel like we’re at a stand still and can’t move forward and definitely don’t want to move Back. Ugh.. prayers would be greatly appreciated now. Oh and there also the possibility that I might get laid off shortly at my job due to budget junk. Sometimes I feel like just eloping because of all this craziness that’s going on.
Post # 3

Member
1420 posts
Bumble bee
- Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley
I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. LD relationships are hard. I had one for two years. One bit of advice I want to give to you is to first live with your SO while you both have some stability in your lives before you get married. Eloping is not going to make your life any less hectic.
Best wishes!
Post # 4

Member
993 posts
Busy bee
@katiecat08: I’m really sorry, but as cliche as it sounds it does get better. I have tons of friends who joined the military/national guard due to benefits, if you are over 18 you have a good shot of just getting placed at some random base in the U.S. long distance still, but at least some stability. I am long distance myself, kinda (2 and a half hrs) so I get the whole wanting to just go and see them and not being able to . but do your best to continue supporting him the way that you have. And like she said above, eloping wont solve your problems. I wish you & your boo all the luck in the world.
Post # 5

Hostess
3572 posts
Sugar bee
@katiecat08: Would it be possible for SO to move in with you? I’m guessing not since he hasn’t done this, but I was just throwing it out there. I don’t think it’s a bad idea to wait to get married for a while longer since you met so recently, but it’s hard to do the distance thing. Darling Husband is currently very VERY far away – basically by the time it’s over, I’ll have gotten to have one one week visit in about a four month period. We also did 6 months LD when we were dating many years ago – honestly, looking back I’m almost amazed we didn’t break up. It was that hard – but totally worth it.
Post # 6

Member
594 posts
Busy bee
Four year LDR veteran here. I can 100% understand how crappy it feels to be so far away from the one you love. It’s not a death sentence though! It sounds like your situation can change at any time, so try to keep your chin up and look for another living solution that doesn’t require long distance. In the meantime, skype will be your best friend. Good luck, and don’t give up! Sending positivity your way 🙂