(Closed) Bad mom already?

posted 7 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@seg31085: I didn’t have one with my son and he is a healthy 3 year old now.

Post # 4
2871 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

@seg31085: I think you are a fine momma!  Lots of people do not have the NT.

Post # 5
2190 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

No! You’re not a bad mom for not doing the NT scan. My doctor urged me not to since I’m under 35 and he runs blood tests for so many disabilities at 15 weeks. I’ve actually never met anyone who has had the NT scan done IRL.

Post # 6
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Don’t feel bad – my OB didn’t even offer the NT scan. I did get the quad screen blood test though.

Post # 8
1116 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

We didn’t have/aren’t having the NT, Integrated, or Quad screens.  We have no reason to think anything is wrong, the screening tests can give false positives, and we weren’t willing to do the CVS or Amnio for an actual diagnosis if the screening came back elevated.  We wouldn’t terminate, so this would only give us an earlier heads up on problems, but was more likely to make me worry unneccessarily than to find anything wrong.  I’m not against the tests at all, and seriously considered them, but just didn’t want to give myself any extra reason to worry.  If something is wrong, we’ll find out when the babies arrive.

Please don’t feel guilty for not having a test done.  A test doesn’t change anything about the health of your baby.  And a screening test only gives you odds of a disorder, not a diagnosis.  I think you have to cut yourself some slack here.  By not getting a screening test, you are not giving or dooming your baby to a problem.

And remember, most of our mom’s didn’t have ultrasounds or screening tests with their pregnancies, and we’re just fine 🙂

Post # 9
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Everyone keeps mentioning this scan but I have no idea what it is and was not offered it. Honestly if there’s any issues with a baby I don’t think people interrogate the parents and ask what tests they did or didn’t have done. It’s your decision and you made the right one for you and that’s all you can ask of a mom 🙂 Besides, it’s a scan not a treatment, so it can’t prevent or cure any abnormalities correct?

Post # 10
1550 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@seg31085: We opted out of the NT. There is no reason why we wouldn’t have a healthy baby, and honestly if something WAS wrong, I wouldn’t want to spend my entire pregnancy worrying and fretting.

Don’t worry, lots of people don’t get it! You’re A-OKAY momma!

Post # 13
679 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Lots of people opt out of the NT scan and sequential screens.  Your doctor is federally mandated to tell you about it as an option though, so all that say their doctor didn’t even offer, that’s a problem.  It’s your own personal choice to follow through or not after hearing the facts. For those who would not do anything regardless of the results, it would provide more of a planning ahead tool if there were any abnormalities detected.  It is highly encouraged for those over the age of 35, as a sidenote.

Post # 14
7777 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Pssh. That so does not make you a bad mother. We opted out of ALL unnecessary testing, which included the NT and the quad screen. You are not the only one!

Post # 15
1829 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@seg31085:  Definitely don’t feel guilty – a lot of people don’t get the NT scan.  The only reason I had it done was because if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have been able to get an ultrasound until the 20 week scan and I didn’t want to wait that long to make sure everything was ok with our little bub.   

Whether or not you had the NT scan does not change the outcome of the baby’s health.  Either it is healthy or it’s not – finding out at the NT scan would have only given you something to worry about as there would not have been a ‘fix’ they could have done to make things better anyway.   Opting out of the scan definitely does NOT make you a bad mom already!

Post # 16
1774 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Please don’t beat yourself up!  This isn’t a standard test, and far from definitive.  It doesn’t protect your baby- it just gives you an inkling of a problem sooner.  I’m a doctor and probably won’t get it done when we have kids unless my OB makes a compelling argument.

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