(Closed) Bad Night with Baby and Husband

posted 5 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
5475 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@ExcitedScaredBee:  Oh my heavens, sorry!  Maybe the crying is a phase?  (DS, not Darling Husband haha)

Hope tonight goes better!

Post # 4
9681 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@DaneLady:  I was thinking the same thing. I know little kids go through phases of which parent is their “favourite” but I haven’t heard of it manifesting at 11 weeks. It must have something to do with the fact that you are home with your son, OP, and spend more time with him due to mat leave (or so I assume). If that’s not the case, then I have no idea and hope it stops soon! 

Post # 6
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Awwww…you all will laugh about this someday I guarantee! Hope baby snaps out of his phase soon!

Post # 7
9681 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@ExcitedScaredBee:  Did your husband get new cologne or wash his clothes in a different detergent when he was away? Maybe your baby is finding an aversion to a smell! Also, if you guys are frustrated and anticipating it will happen, maybe baby is sensing the tension. Something must be scaring the little guy unintentionally. 

Post # 8
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Although it sounds awful but you have to leave. My daughter has a strong preference for me, and went through 2 long periods so far were she would be very upset sitting ith my husband instead of me. The thing that helped most is giving them special bonding time where going to me is not an option. It took a while but it has definitely helped.

Post # 9
1778 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I am so sorry this happened.  Good for your husband to keep trying.  Odd question… does he have any facial hair or glasses?

Post # 10
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@ExcitedScaredBee:  I don’t have any kids, so take my opinon with a grain of salt but… 🙂


It sounds to me like maybe it’s a jealousy thing? Your son sounds like he’s used to being with just you after your husband’s trip. Maybe they need a day or two of special boys only bonding?

Post # 12
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

if you google it it seems to be a surprisingly common problem! suggestions to fix it include daddy only bonding time and having his face near yours while you breastfeed so the baby will make positive associations

Post # 13
1018 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

Sorry you are dealing with this! I would probably force some bonding time to help your little one get past this phase. Let Daddy help give him his bath at night, and eventually transition to him giving the bath alone while you are out of the room. When he cries don’t change behavior, as this could reinforce it. For example, if he cries and Darling Husband leaves the room then he will learn that by crying he can have mommy all to himself. I’m sure he will grow out of this phase soon!

Post # 14
7647 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@ExcitedScaredBee:  Aww this would be so hard!! I suggest a special bonding day with just daddy and son. Perhaps since he was gone for so many days and because you got to bond with LO that he may just not know dad very well OR it could be a jealousy thing. I hope I don’t have to go through this too (although I know someday you will look back and laugh about this).

Post # 15
5660 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Are you exclusively breastfeeding or doing any bottle feeding? That seems to be a strong bonding time so maybe doing a few bottles would be a good idea? Or have Darling Husband do something DS really likes? Bathtime, something he finds comforting?

I dunno, I feel bad for your DH! Poor guy!

Post # 16
861 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My baby is like this too, and it started when she was pretty near newborn. She’s fine with family members and strangers, but she acts like my husband is an axe murderer. I think it’s because whenever I am gone out of the house for hours, he’s watching her, and so she associates him with my absence. I know that in our case daddy only bonding time made it worse, and what has helped is her getting older (more independent play stuff that she’s interested in when he’s hanging with her) and him spending time with her when I am in the house and she’s in a good mood (well fed and just up from a nap). She’s 5 months now. 

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