- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2012
I could really use some advice on what to do about my Maid/Matron of Honor and I apologize in advance for the length of my post. I got engaged about a year ago and asked one of my closest friends to be my Maid/Matron of Honor. Shortly thereafter, she got engaged as well and asked me to be her Maid/Matron of Honor for her wedding, which would take place before mine. Throughout the planning process, I did all I could do to help her, even as I worked to plan my own wedding.
The bride’s parents gave her a lump sum of money for her wedding and she chose to save as much as she could for herself and do her wedding as cheaply as possible. This of course resulted in her expecting everyone else to pay for her wedding. She picked the most expensive bridesmaids dresses that she could find, insisted that we all get (and pay for) manicures before the wedding, and all of our food throughout the weekend. I flew in from out of town for the wedding and had to BEG her to come and pick me up at airport. I also asked for recommendations for a hotel where I could stay, but she said she had no idea and was too busy to give me a recommendation. Needless to say, at this point I was hurt and my patience was rapidly fraying. I’d also spent over $1,500 for her wedding at this point.
The wedding itself also damaged our relationship. Although I was told that I was the Maid/Matron of Honor (and of course expected to throw her a bachelorette party and shower, which I did) I was not even acknowledged as such in the program nor did I sign her marriage license. The icing on the cake was when she had over 100 more people attend the wedding than she had food and seating for, so the entire wedding party did not eat and was expected to stand throughout the reception. For all of this, I got an insincere thank you on which I owed postage. That’s right, I’m still paying for that wedding since she was too cheap to put a stamp on her thank yous!
It sounds petty, but I honestly don’t want to see my friend for a very long time, let alone have her as the Maid/Matron of Honor in my wedding. I have no idea how to even broach the subject with her because she thinks her wedding was great and she handled everything so well I’ve been hoping that I would get over the whole situation, but it’s not happening. Am I being petty? Should I step up and say something?