Post # 1
Hi Bees! My husband and i have a question and it’s something that’s a little confusing to both of us. We have a joint checking and a joint savings account. We kept our seperate credit cards but we pay our credit cards from our joint checking. A friend of mine recently bought a house with her husband and casually mentioned that he pays the mortgage and she pays the utilities and they alternate buying groceries. I didn’t say anything but that is very strange to me. Another friend of mine mentioned that she and her husband take turns buying diapers/baby food/medicine etc… for their daughter…. We started a savings account together when we were engaged to pay for our wedding, now it’s used as a house buying fund. I grew up with my parents having joint accounts with the mentality that we’re married and what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is mine so it’s OUR money. Do you have a joint acount? why or why not? No judging here! My husband and i were jsut curious as to why people would have seperate accounts. And if you do have seperate accounts what did you do after your wedding? did you split the money evenly between the two of you? Or was it like you get the money from your family and your significant other gets the money from their family?
Post # 2
Yes, all joint in practice. We’ve been too lazy to add names to some of the accounts, but it’s all ‘ours’. We make about the same amount, neither of us spends a lot or is concerned about the others spending habits so we have no money arguements or issues at all. We thought about having separate spending accounts, but then our reasoning against it was that I spend more anyways… so lets say I spend all “my” spending money and then “we” need money for a vacation or something. Are we not going to go if “he” has the money and “I” dont? No! “He” would have to just end up putting more money in for me, so in the end.. it’s joint.
Post # 3
We have joint checking and saving accounts but we each have our own credit cards, mostly just in case of emergencies. Neither of us are crazy spenders or anything so if we’re going to be making a big purchase we just run it by the other first. I think separate accounts just sounds incredibly annoying personally lol.
Post # 4
Fiance and I have joint and separate accounts. We make a budget based on our incomes and average our cost of living (mortgage, utilities, groceries/household items, toll tag, car payment, insurance etc, etc) and a set amount of money is directly deposited to our joint account. The remainder is direct deposited to our personal accounts and is “play” money – if I want to go shopping, or if he wants to buy cigars, eating out at work or more often than what we budgeted for, whatever.
Post # 5
Hubby and I have a joint checking account which we didn’t get until we returned from our honeymoon to deposit our monetary gifts for the house fund. It works great to pay the bills that we share like mortage and other household bills. so our separate bills are paid from our separate accounts So if we buy little gifts for each other The surprise isn’t ruined. We both appreciate the separate accounts that may be linked to lines of credit we can use in a crunch. These were in place prior to marriage.
For or the most part our shared bills are split down the middle but other expenses like daycare I take care of since my salary is a little larger and I have less schools debt.
Post # 6
- Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas
We have joint checking and savings, but we also still have our own personal accounts. We put money into our joint monthly, or whenever we need to, for anything considered a joint purchase. Groceries, household stuff, dinners, bills. The only time we use our personal ones is if we go shopping seperately for clothes or whatever.
Post # 7
daniellemc: We have “yours, mine, and ours” checking and savings accounts. It’s a lot of accounts…way more than necessary, but it works for us. We use our shared checking to pay rent and bills (including a shared credit card) and, like you, a shared savings, into which we deposited all wedding gifts, will eventually help us to purchase a home. Darling Husband and I both grew up with the mentality that everything is shared, so it was a natural decision for us to manage our finances similarly. I think that each couple should do what works for them (even if I do personally think it’s wierd that in some relationships one person is responsible for the mortgage, etc.) It does, however, make a little more sense to me that partners keep assests separate if for example one partner had a business or property prior to getting married, and for accounting purposes it’s simpler to keep some separation. Despite my judgment, I don’t think that one approach is better than any other. Whatever keeps the peace in a relationship and ensures a secure financial future together is what a couple should do.
Post # 8
We aren’t married yet but we have separate checking and savings, and then a joint savings. We have very different financial situations – he makes about 3x what I make. I pay 1/3 of rent plus groceries and he pays for everything else. We use the Cash app to split other big purchases (i.e. when we got a new sofa or when we book trips) and it’s very easy. We might get joint checking in the future but we don’t see the need right now. As long as we meet our financial obligations (pay our rent and all of our bills, plus we each put 1/3 of our monthly income after taxes into joint savings) then the remainder of our pay checks is ours to spend how like. I’m still in graduate school but I expect I will always make less than he does (he’s in a more profitable field) – I still look forward to it being a bit more equitable! I wouldn’t want to buy a house if I couldn’t comfortably swing 1/2 the mortgage payments, for example. Our mentality is still what’s mine is yours, but I would feel ridiculous spending his pay checks on clothes – he makes more, but I still make more than I need.
Post # 9
We also have joint and independent checking and savings like gatsbybride2016:.
Ours is a 75/25 split… 75% of each direct deposit goes into the joint checking account, 25% goes into personal. At the end of the month, anything over $X in the joint checking rolls over to the joint savings.
Almost everything comes out of joint other than gifts, unnecessary shopping sprees (guilty!) and nights out on the town without the other (so girls night goes on my personal; if we both were out, it’d go on joint).
Post # 10
We are the random percent that actually doesn’t have joint accounts, and never will. I have always been very anal about money. I like to control it, i don’t like to use others, and what mine is mine. I never got the whole “yours is mine, and vice versa” message of marriage. Sure, we sure everything but that doesn’t mean I want our money combined. We pay everything 50/50, with the exception of our cable bill, which I pay. He pays his bills, I pay mine. It’s pretty simple for us. Sure, one of us may have more money then the other one week, but honestly doesn’t bug us. We do share though, if we are in a pickle, like car issues, that one came up recently for both of us with no issue.
Post # 11
fuchsia1027: I agree with you on that. Whatever works for you and yours you do it!
Post # 12
We have separate bank accounts and a few shared credit cards. We are each responsible for the same expenses every month, we don’t take turns buying groceries or medicine, that arrangement seems odd to me.
Our gifts of money were split according to the accounts that were most depleted paying for the wedding. So in our case most of the money went into my husband’s bank account and less into mine.
I don’t really have an answer on why we do it this way. Except that we each had our own accounts when we met and i guess there has never been a reason to change anything. Our system works fine for us but I think it’s because we are well matched when it comes to money & spending habits more than anything.
Post # 13
We do consider the majority of our money to be joint but we have separate accounts. This is pretty much the easiest for us and part of the reason is because he owns his own business and would need to write checks anyway for his income (so no direct deposit like I have with my job) plus business expenses we right off (i.e. portion of the mortgage and bills) need to be given in check form. Plus he has his business accounts and a personal checking at the bank he likes and I have my accounts at my bank I like.
Basically we have a joint credit card and put almost every expense on that and then I pay it out of my checking each month. I pay all the bills out of mine. He just gives me checks for business/personal income which is a set amount. Plus another check if he charged any business expenses to the cc. I do almost all of the shopping and spending anyway and I do all of our budgeting and saving so I just maintain those accounts and at this point I’d rather him stay out of them since I follow a budget and do all of the shopping anyway. His personal checking is just for frivolous stuff like poker money. I just spend my personal money out of my checking (I have a set budget for my own personal money).
Post # 14
We do exactly the same thing you do – joint checking and savings accounts but separate credit cards. We also have a joint brokerage account we use for retirement savings. This works for us and makes record-keeping and bill paying easy.
Post # 15
My parents also only have joint accounts and joint credit cards. We opened a joint checking and joint savings shortly after we got engaged. We do have our our own credit cards and own checking/savings accounts, but neither of us keeps much money in them. I manage our finances, so I pay off both of our credit cards and pay the utilities from our joint account. We both put money into the joint savings for our honeymoon, and later, a down payment for a house. We agreed that we each would get $x a month for random spending, but in practice, we put all of it in our joint accounts and if I want to go to brunch or he wants to grab drinks with his friends, it’s nbd.
ETA: I have a separate brokerage account that my parents set up for me as a retirement fund when I was in high school that my Fiance does not have access to. I also have my own 401k and Roth IRA, but it’s not like I would keep that money from him whenever we retire.