- 9 years ago
- Wedding: March 2013
My boyfriend of five years proposed on the March 17th, which was when we were celebrating our anniversary (it was actually the 20th, but we wouldn’t have been able to do anything that day).
I was thrilled! The ring is lovely and exactly my style. We called my parents that night and they’re happy and excited. His family knew a few days prior and are happy (aside from his Dad immediately asking him, “Where’d you get the money for a ring?”).
And while plenty of people have expressed happiness and excitement, it’s the handful (OK, maybe two handfuls) of people who express happiness with a mixture of other things that’s getting me down.
I’m the last cousin on both sides of the family to either get married or have a baby. Since I was about 13-years-old, I’ve been hearing about that; I’m 26-years-old now. Upon telling family, the first response is, “When are you having a baby?” My biological clock has been a hot topic for many years now.
Also, we’ve decided not to set/make any officially plans until after we graduate, which is in one month. We want to conquer that first. People are still asking, even when we say sometime in 2013, and they are skeptical that we’re just avoiding the question or don’t want to make any plans. Between my fiance and I, we are talking about things, making a binder of ideas, talking expenses, insuring my ring, but we don’t have anything to announce officially yet. I just want to scream, “Give us a month!”
And then there’s the close friends. On the day two of my friends called me to say congratulations, the conversation became about how one friend had a huge fight with her boyfriend about one of his addictions and the other friend called to tell me her boyfriend dumped her. And then there’s the friends who say, “Oh, it’ll be years before I’m engaged. :::sigh:::”
Oh, and my ring. It’s small. It’s what I wanted. I didn’t want oodles of money spent on it and I wanted simplicity. So, when people ask, “Let me see the rock” and I show it to them, people are actually making comments like, “It’s more like a pebble.”
And because we were together for five years, and had been getting the question, “When are you getting engaged/married?” for the last three years, some people said, “I’m not surprised” (and not in the “happy” way) in place of anything congratulatory. It was as if this was all old news before it became news.
Finally, because we were engaged on a Saturday, and my fiance had classes on a Monday (I don’t), people congratulated him. Fantastic! When I got to campus on Tuesday, people said nothing to me. Some actually said, “Do I say congratulations to you? I already did to [insert fiance’s name].” Ugh.
I’m just trying to keep my spirits up with these things.