(Closed) Been meaning to post this…

posted 7 years ago in Rings
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  • Post # 47
    808 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    I read the arrest report (which I think you should delete).

    Let me tell you a story. My Fi’s ex wife had a loving, sweet, gentle mother. She had an abusive, alcoholic mentally ill father who beat the mother & the children. Mom broke it off with dad many, many times but always took him back. In 2003 dad killed mom & then himself in front of the nursing home that grandma was in. By all accounts mom was highly intellegent (she was a social worker) and the sweetest person on earth, but she allowed this man to ruin her life and the lives of her children. 

    My finace’s ex, their child, was put through living hell and as a result she is highly dysfunctional, has mental illness & drug & alcohol problems. Her two children are suffering as a result of her inability to parent them (we have custody).

    Please be very, very, very certain that everything is “solved” before you have children with this man. The cycle of abuse and the havoc it wrecks on innocent children is heartbreaking.



    Post # 48
    353 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Wow … A 5 page criminal record including felony theft, drug possession, terroristic threats, and weapons possession. What a charmer. Also, that’s what you call a “mishap”??   I don’t pray, but man, I’m sending as much positive energy as I can that you escape this situation with your life.

    Post # 49
    6256 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2014

    You know if he is charged with a felony, it will be next to impossible for him to get a decent job when he gets out, right? Even fast food checks these days.

    You seem fairly intelligent. I promise you that there is a man out there who will treat you well. Finding someone who won’t abuse you and stays on the right side of the law sets the bar really low. There are so many guys who fit into that category, and I know there are probably a lot of them who would feel so lucky to be with a girl as loving and loyal as you. Don’t let your good qualities be your downfall. You deserve a lot better than it sounds like you’ve been getting. Men who have these sorts of problems don’t just magically “get better” one day. I know because my sister is in the process of divorcing one of them right now. She’s spent fully 1/3 of her life in a living hell created by the man who loves her. Please, just think about what people on here are saying. A lot of them have lived the life you’re about to sign on for.

    Post # 50
    9130 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    You deserve someone who will worship you and who thinks that doing anything to hurt you is a gazillion times worse than hurting himself.  No matter what the rationale – insecurity, PTSD, fucked up family, etc – what this guy has done to you over the course of your short relationship is unforgivable.  You are so young and have the chance to have pure happiness with a worthy man, not an abusive felon.  :/

    Post # 51
    700 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2004

    I surely can read. I would NEVER marry someone who ended up in jail. Unless it was some giant mix up where he was wrongfully accused. “Everything’s fine now”… Wow. Just wow. It’s disturbing that you tell yourself that. Are you really young or naive or something? How do you expect him to be a supporting husband, emotionally and financially? I hope you realize what a catastrophic mistake this is and escape this ridiculous horrible situation. 

    Post # 52
    2868 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @MissFormaldehyde:  There is more than one incident. That’s quite a rap sheet.

    The topic ‘Been meaning to post this…’ is closed to new replies.

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