- 4 years ago
- Wedding: May 2017
Hi Bees! So here’s my story. SO and I have been together for almost three years (3 years on January 5th). I graduated from college in April and we both have full-time jobs. We’re been living together for more than two years. SO purchased a ring LAST November, a year ago. We picked it out together. We’ve talked about it many times, and at first he told me he wanted to wait until I was done with school before proposing, which I get. But, now I’ve been out of school for seven months and still no ring. I kept thinking he was waiting for a special day – Thanksgiving, Christmas, anniversary, Valentine’s etc. last year, but nothing. He has spoken to my parents about it and both are on board.
Now just last week he tells me that the reason he hasn’t proposed is because he is “afraid to ruin a good thing”. He was engaged in the past (but it was years ago, and at a very young age) and it didn’t end well obviously. He is afraid of going down the same road with me. So my question now is, will he ever be comfortable enough to propose? I feel like we’ve been together almost 3 years, live together, work decent jobs, and I’m ready to take this to the next level; marriage, buying a house, kids, etc. But I feel like it all starts with being engaged. I’ve even told him numerous times that I was a longish engagement so we have lots of time to plan and save money. That doesn’t seem to make him feel beter. I don’t think that getting engaged will “ruin” our good thing, but he sees it that way I guess.
I don’t know, am I being unreasonable? Should I just keep waiting it out? Is there something I could do or say to make him feel better about “us”? Any help or advice appreciated!