(Closed) Bees! From a guests point of view, what do YOU want to see at a wedding?

posted 7 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Love, I’m not a mushy person but that is the one thing I want to see at weddings. The love the couple have for each other, the famly and friends love and support for the couple. The party, food, music, and everything else is just icing on the cake. I think too many times people go to weddings and forget that and aren’t focused on the right things.

Post # 4
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

shade so we are not sitting in the hot blazing sun for too long – nice for the bride to show up late while her guests a melting

unless its inside then aircon and if its a really old church with no air con then give us a fan or a program so we can fan ourselves

Post # 6
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

The bride and groom having fun! Nothing is worse than a mad bride.

Cold drinks, food, and nice company. Alchol is always a plus when getting groups of strangers together.

Post # 7
2253 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

A good DJ. Music always helps set the mood. Except I hope I never attend another wedding that played Christmas music. Kind of awkward in the middle of September.

Post # 8
14494 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Timelines and directions on what to do.  I have been to my share of weddings where the guests are at the receptions starving and waiting for hours for the bride and groom to show up.  In several of those, that was the original plan but they neglected to tell the guests.  If they were not DHs or my family, we would have left like so many other guests did.  Say please and thank you and ask if you need help, I hate seeing a stressed out bride because she forgot to schedule people to clean up.  Seeing the bride and groom happy, mushy, loving, and relaxed are makings for the best weddings.

Post # 9
828 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

My views on this have changed a little bit since planning my own wedding, but in general as a guest I hope to be treated with the same courtesy and respect that you would show me if I was visiting your home.

These are some of the things that I wish had been different at weddings I’ve been to and they pretty much all could have been avoided with better planning.

– That the invitation had indicated that the ceremony was outside.

– That they had planned a different day or time of day for an un-shaded outdoor ceremony during the hotest part of the day in one of the hotest months of the year

– That there was more signage or someone to direct us to where to go for weddings that are at locations with large campuses or multiple buildings.

– That since there was more than one church with almost the exact same name that directions were very important to provide

– That they had considered that half of the guests wouldn’t be able to see or hear during the ceremony because of the layout of the space and trees

– That they had spent the extra money to allow all of the guests to sit down during the ceremony in part so that the children wouldn’t be running around

– That they had realized that their tented nighttime reception would need outside lighting for guests to walk to the rest rooms (This was actually really dangerous because it was pitch black before the photographer stepped up with her lighting equipment.)

– That they hadn’t asked the guests to stage a fake Going Away shot with bubbles much before they actually left so that the photographer could leave early (I really think that they should have just done this after the ceremony.)

– That the Father of the Bride had spoken to individuals beforehand about helping with the clean up rather than requesting that all of the family stay during his speech

– That the wedding party hadn’t ALL given speeches at the rehearsal dinner, so that when it came time for speeches at the wedding no one had anything more to say and those who weren’t at the rehearsal dinner were left wondering what was said


Post # 10
3942 posts
Honey bee


The last few weddings I have been to ran out of food during cocktail hour, and it was another hour or 2 before dinner was served. I was starving and everyone was getting wasted due to drinking on an empty stomach.

Other things I like to see are

  •  The bride and groom enjoying themselves-nothing worse than seeing the newlyweds hardly spending time together at their own wedding
  • Good music-goes without saying
  • A hotel block set up for out of town guests-Last wedding we went to was local for the bride and groom-but the grooms family (about 20 guests) did have to travel. Nothing was set up and we weren’t familiar with the area. Would have been helpful for them to set up  block-especially because it doesn’t cost them anything.


Post # 11
5889 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

i’m going to second this- seeing relaxed and happy couple having FUN totally sets the tone for the wedding.

Post # 12
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Decent food and drink and I’m happy.

Directions about how the day is going to unfold are always appreciated. If things don’t go according to plan, that’s fine, but an idea of wat the plan is would be nice. I also want to know when to skip out so I can avoid any boquet or garter based activites, they make me squirm. 

Happy, relazed, loving couple and family – way more important than any centerpiece or theme. 


Post # 13
1271 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Good [plentiful] food and an open bar.

Post # 14
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would love to see some sort of activity or entertainment besides just dancing.  I get bored sitting at my table (don’t enjoy dancing).

Post # 15
5073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

good food and great music  

Post # 16
2775 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

In order of importance:

1.  A happy, relaxed bride & groom.

2.  Good food and drink, and plenty of it.  A comfortable place to sit.  Climate control.

3.  Good music/entertainment.

Brides to be, take note of this thread (and others like it) when planning your wedding and allocating your budget.  Notice that nobody ever says uplighting, chiavari chairs, exotic flowers, etc.


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