(Closed) Bees! General question here about your engagements

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
Member
748 posts
Busy bee

@VictoriaK1990:  I was not surprised.  At the time we were in an LDR and had already decided to get married months before.  I told him the kind of ring I wanted, just a really small simple solitaire (I told him a quarter carat would be fine as we had just graduated college and had no money!), and when he visited me over Christmas that year, he gave me the ring in the car at the airport when I picked him up…no bended knee, which was totally fine by me.  I already knew he was bringing it and I just basically said “So where is it?!!”  He pulled out the box… with a .75ct solitaire in it, and we both just stared at the ring on my finger.  And I drove us home and nearly drove off the interstate staring at my hand!

Ah memories.  🙂

Post # 4
Member
2334 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@VictoriaK1990:  

we’d been together 6.5 yrs and had talked about marriage and being together forever etc, but every time i thought it was coming it never did – i was getting a wee bit impatient, but the night that he actually proposed i had NO idea it was coming, even when he was saying his speech to me about how much he loved me etc i still didnt click. (DUH) only when he got down on one knee and said “so i have a question to ask you, ” did i click and say “holy shit is this what i think it is????” i was so oblivious haha!!!! which made it so much more special, i was on cloud 9!!

Post # 6
Member
748 posts
Busy bee

@VictoriaK1990:  Oh that’s awesome!  Love that he remembered to stash the ring – details are important 🙂

Post # 7
Member
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@VictoriaK1990:  we had discussed it and I knew he had the ring. He was a little squirrely on the day he proposed and kepy putting his hand in his pocket nervously. I thought maybe he was fiddling with the ring and he was, but it was still an awesome surprise.

Post # 8
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

I was surprised to some degree!  We’d discussed marriage to a large degree already beforehand and then the actual day of I had an inkling about it because we specially made plans to meet up after work which we usually don’t do (especially because we work 50 miles away from each other) and went to kind of a tourist spot.  BUT as soon as we were there I was kind of lost in the moment, didn’t think about a proposal at all, so when he actually popped the question I was like omg!  But of course it wasn’t a giant surprise 🙂

Post # 9
Member
4049 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Nope, at at all. We bought the ring a few months before and actually had it shipped to my flat. I tried it on and everything to make sure it was good! Then I visited him in England over Christmas and carried the ring with me.

We had agreed we’d make things official by Christmas because we wanted a little time as an officially engaged couple before I had to fly back to the States. So as the weeks passed and it was Christmas Day, I knew it would happen then.

Of course I didn’t know the exact moment or how, and he teased me all day about it, which was cute. Eventually he started acting so weird, and I knew something was up. Then he popped the question!

Even though it was not at all a surprise, it was still an amazing moment. So much was riding on it – getting engaged meant putting a firm date on the end of our LDR.

Post # 10
Member
750 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@VictoriaK1990: 

We knew we were in it for the long haul. We talked about having a life together, with kids one day, and what we would need to do to get to our career goals.

He had asked me about rings I liked, and I had sent my best friend some things I liked, and we have some people around us getting married. We recently had something happen (health scare related), and it made our relationship stronger. I didn’t realize it, but that really made him think, “I’m going to be with this woman for the rest of my life, what am I waiting for.”

However, I had no idea the proposal was coming. Any thoughts towards the subject were wishful thinking in my mind. He is still working on his Master’s Degree and has one year left, and I am working on getting some experience in my field so that I can be accepted to a Master’s program in a year or two.

So a week ago when it happened, I was not expecting it. It was perfect.

 

Post # 11
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I was 100% surprised. We had talked about marriage but he told me that it would be a few years. We touched on rings a bit and then I just sort of let it go. He had just graduated and gotten a job and I was still in school and I really thought it’d be at least 2 more years so I wasn’t in a rush or anything. He popped the question 3 weeks after our 2 year anniversary. I loved how I had no idea and I loved that be picked out my ring and planned a gorgeous evening even though it was 7 degrees and we had 2.5 feet of snow on the ground. 

Post # 12
Hostess
12100 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

@VictoriaK1990:  seeing as I picked out my ring I wasn’t terribly surprised but we’ve also been together 8.5 years at this point.  I didn’t know he’d purchased it and I didn’t know WHEN (although I had my suspicions) but I wasn’t overly surprised – but i was (and am) VERY HAPPY!!

Post # 13
Member
872 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@VictoriaK1990:  I wasn’t suprised – We talked about it a lot for a year. 

We’ve been together for 6 years now, and in our fourth year we got very serious about getting married when his mother’s health began to fail. In our fifth year he proposed. We talked about the date, and we picked out the ring together. 

I guess that isn’t super romantic/suprising, but it was something we wanted to do so badly, and we felt completely ready for this to happen in our lives that we wanted to move past the formalities, and finally be what we’ve considered ourselves for years – man and wife!

Post # 14
Member
4466 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I think there’s a difference between being surprised by the proposal because you had no prior discussions about marriage, and being surprised at the when and how. I think any couple who gets engaged without having a serious discussion (or many) about their future is basically setting themselves up for a long, hard road. I won’t say they will fail, because that’s judgmental and maybe they won’t, but sharing common goals, values and dreams for the future is the foundation every couple needs to have. If you don’t talk about it beforehand you risk not knowing that you don’t see eye to eye on those things too late. My proposal was not a surprise and I knew when it was coming. I even knew how my husband was planning on doing it, but she blew me away regardless. 

Post # 15
Member
2809 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

he first proposed over the phone 2 months after we “got together” when he was drunk. his best friend also proposed for him that night. we were long distance for the beginning of our relationship. so the first proposal caught me off guard. and then he remembered proposing. so that was interesting.

the second one, the “official” one also caught me off guard because he was a) sober, and b) with me in person. i was thrilled though.

Post # 16
Member
1048 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I had a pretty good idea – I’d spotted an email of his about a ring which he then hastily deleted and started ranting about spam – highly suspicious! Plus he’d flown my to Sydney for a surprise birthday treat. The night before he proposed I spotted a ring box shaped bulge in his pocket and was expecting him to propose, but he lost his bottle. For some reason he thought after 6 very happy years together there was a chance I’d turn him down! He managed to ask me the next day though, so all good.

I haven’t told him that I knew it was coming. He put so much effort in that he’d be really really disappointed if he found out.

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