(Closed) Bees, How do you feel about your spouse watching Porn?

posted 8 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: How do you feel about your spouse watching porn?
    I am against my spouse watching porn, and I believe that SO doesn't watch it, ever. : (80 votes)
    13 %
    I am against my spouse watching porn, but I think SO does it anyway. : (23 votes)
    4 %
    I am against my spouse watching porn, but I know SO does it anyway. : (39 votes)
    7 %
    I don't care if SO watches porn. : (249 votes)
    42 %
    We watch porn together. : (96 votes)
    16 %
    I would be upset if SO watched it without me. : (18 votes)
    3 %
    Certain types of porn are off limits, but generally, I don't mind. : (32 votes)
    5 %
    We have never had this conversation. : (6 votes)
    1 %
    My SO isn't interested in porn. : (57 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 77
    Member
    1542 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    i am 120% against him watching it. I’d end him. Thankfully he doesn’t care. He’s smart enough to know that if he wants to keep the real thing – he won’t watch the fake thing.

    Post # 78
    Member
    895 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I don’t care if Darling Husband watches porn as long as he comes to me first. If he wants sex and I turn him down then he is free to watch porn and take matters into his own hands. I would be upset if I was ready and willing but he decided to watch porn instead. There would be problems in that scenario because it would then be interfering in our sex life.

    Post # 79
    Member
    203 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I was in a situation a year ago with my SO where he was choosing to watch porn rather then being intimate with me. Huge problem! I talked to him about it, which ended in a fight and him walking out on me and the kids for a month before begging me to take him back. He finally admited to the excessive porn watching and promised he wouldn’t do it anymore. 

    As of today we still don’t have sex and I’m pretty sure he still watches porn. He just bought a new lap top he keeps password protected in his basement mancave. With all that said, it is not lost on me that our issues go much deeper than porn, but porn is NOT helping the situation! :/

    Post # 80
    Member
    98 posts
    Worker bee

    @Vidya:  Me and the SO are the same way. I feel kinda self concious about it. Like because I watch porn I’m like a guy. Lol.

    Post # 81
    Member
    458 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I would think my Darling Husband was weird if he didn’t? I feel like it’s perfectly okay.

    Post # 82
    Member
    30 posts
    Newbee

    @S.Elizabeth.G:  

     

    I watch it myself sometimes and enjoy it, for a long time I felt weird about it, I didn’t think other women did it, just men.

     

    I met my bf who at first said he didn’t like porn, then I admitted to liking it, then he finally fessed up. Hahah

     

    He doesn’t think it’s weird that I like it too, he seems surprised and relieved.

    Post # 83
    Member
    2424 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I’m not a huge fan of it, but I don’t forbid it or anything. He probably watches it occasionally, but I really just don’t stress over it.

    Post # 84
    Member
    2780 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @MrsDocHorrorShow:  Your generilation is hilarious and so far off the mark. My Fiance watches porn, on his own and together, when we watch together he always makes me pick to prevent me from being hurt or whatever if he picks (it’s a sweet concern, but not necessary).

    That being said I’ve seen the type of stuff he watches not like he clears the history, and I’ve actually caught him in the process or watching it. Not all men watch extreme stuff. I think the younger generation has in general become so desensitized to many things, but it takes a certain amount of metal issues to watch truly disturbing things such as beastiality and child porn. 

    That goes for any man I know, not all men ‘hide’ the truth of their habits, this is no longer a society that thinks sex and masturbation are wrong. Most men feel like watching porn is normal, and it is, as long as they aren’t choosing fastasy over real-life.

     

    Post # 85
    Member
    237 posts
    Helper bee

    @drummerbride:  “this is no longer a society that thinks sex and masturbation are wrong.” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ha. K.

    Post # 86
    Member
    59 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @chickiebee:  Girl, me too! I know my views stem from some marital problems of my parents’ but it is 100% a deal breaker and Fiance knows it.

    Post # 87
    Member
    482 posts
    Helper bee

    i dont care if he watches, sometimes we watch together.

    Post # 88
    Member
    424 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Being against porn isn’t the same as being against sex and masturbation.  For a lot of women, what’s troubling about porn is that A) It centers on male fantasies B) These fantasies are often degrading or objectifying to women B) It often results in women having to fit into the traditional male conceptualization of female sexuality, rather than discovering her own idea of her sexuality.  Actually, this is true for males, too.  Porn gives us this sexual script that we feel obligated to follow, even if this script isn’t that great or satisfying.

    Not to mention, porn can actually be bad for sex.  Too much consumption conditions us to the point where we start needing more and more extreme stimuli to arouse us.

     

    Post # 89
    Member
    919 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I feel much the same as you, OP.  We are in a LDR, so I assume he does watch it.  I’m not mad happy about it, but I can’t stop him.  It is a tiny part of our life together, as it should be – if it was affecting our sex life, it would be a different story, believe me. 

    When we are together, I’ve told him that I don’t want to know about it, and I expect him to be discrete, and not do it when I’m in the house. 

    Post # 90
    Member
    1092 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @happyface:  OMG!!!!! Another bee’s husband who has no interest in the computer/internet. My husband is the same way, he likes the internet when he wants info and wants it known now but asks me to look it up. He has no desire to learn either. I don’t mind being his personal internet secretary since I’m online a lot.

    Post # 91
    Member
    15 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    When Darling Husband watches porn, I get very upset.  If he wants to watch it then he better not come to me when he wants some.

    The topic ‘Bees, How do you feel about your spouse watching Porn?’ is closed to new replies.

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