(Closed) bees, please help me erase the doubt…

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2788 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Its the same girl who tried to break you up before? That’s ridiculous. I don’t understand the motive behind telling someone’s so you are the other women (when they aren’t). I think if your bf hasn’t given you any reason to doubt him up until now, trust him and ignore the crazy.

Post # 5
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@kittybean:Hey, girl. That’s a rough situation. Maybe you should talk to someone who knows you and your boyfriend well enough to assess the situation. It’s hard for an outsider to know or understand the kind of person he is and be able to give you sound advice. I’m sorry those girls are giving you trouble. 

Post # 6
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@kittybean: I’d be careful of this. I kept getting messages via myspace (back in the day) that my previous SO was cheating. I always dismissed it, because I knew he had a crazy ex-girlfriend, who actually called me when we first started dating. I just figured it was her and I ignored it.  I got a couple msg’s here and there, but I knew that my SO wasn’t like that.

Then, one night he got a text that I read from a girl and he tried to play it off. Come to find out he had been cheating. We were always together and I used that as my way of thinking it wasn’t possible, when I questioned it. I didn’t want to get all crazy and jealous if he wasn’t doing anything, however, they met at work and would go out on lunch dates together. I would have never thought that could happen and it didn’t keep him from spending time with me. I caught them before it got physical, but I was devistated.

EDIT: I know you wanted me to say the opposite thing, but I just felt like it was better to be honest.

Post # 7
Member
2091 posts
Buzzing bee

I hate to sound harsh, really, but be wary of any guy who tries to explain away a situation like this by calling the girl crazy. All too many times it’s true and the men think if they put an insane spin on the girl you won’t believer her. I’ve seen it happen too many times to count. Unless you’ve personally witnessed the crazy, be careful.

I’m not saying your guy is lying to you. I sincerely hope he isn’t. I’d ask the girl for proof. She says he’s sent her photos? Ask to see them. If she doesn’t produce, she’s lying. 

Post # 9
Member
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

It is weird, especially since it has happened twice with two different people. 

Post # 12
Member
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@kittybean: Ohh, okay then! Well, then I would disregard that one! Sorry!

Post # 13
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@kittybean: I’m just playing devils advocate I guess…

The first time I got one, from his ex, she was stinking crazy, straight looney tunes. They had a very strange break up.

The second time this started, my SO had proposed 7 weeks earlier. We were engaged. He later admitted everything and he went out with her the first time 5 weeks after we were engaged.

Post # 14
Member
1405 posts
Bumble bee

Maybe he told girl #1 they were on a break and stringing her along while he was waiting to see if things worked out with you.  So I could see her sending an email saying she loved him if she thought they could fix things.

Girl # 2 – hmmm,  I sort of think he is constantly talking about getting engaged so much because he feels guilty.

Post # 15
Member
1954 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I think the pattern here is that more often than not, this turns out to be true. And I don’t want to offend you here, but the story seems sort of implausible. Why would this girl care that much about the project that THIS is her reaction when they say they don’t need her. That doesn’t add up to me. I’m not saying it’s true, but I wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss her as crazy. Like a PP said, that’s a convenient excuse guys use to turn the situation around.

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