(Closed) Bees posting about wedding budget

posted 12 years ago in Money
Post # 47
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Congrats to those of you watching your budget!

It is just one day, afterall.  A VERY special day, but one day.  Don’t go into debt just to "keep up with the Jones’," as the saying goes.

Also, I think that this topic IS completely relevant on a message board like this.  As WeddingBee readers, we have the option to or not to comment on which ever post we like.  While you’re obviously free to post and talk about how innappropriate you think the topic is, you’re also free to silently say, "no thanks" and keep your finances to yourself.  That’s the joy of message boards! 🙂

As for my budget, I have NO IDEA WHAT TO DO.  Big and go 10,000s of dollars into debt?  Big but uber casual?  Small and elegant?? Small and casual?  Do I even need to be there? Gaa!  Message board topics like this help me keep things in perspective.  If I had a budget to share, I would.

Post # 48
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

@ ilovenycmissie – I can’t believe you are doing your wedding at the Waldorf on a $15k budget! Good for you!

Post # 49
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I can also see why people would be leery of posting their budget, I think with the internet it would be easier for me, personally, rather than discussing it in person with people that I don’t know so well. It has even been hard for me to share details with my closest friends/bridesmaids when those whom I am close with have shared theirs with me.

My Fiance and I are both employed by the same company and our relationship is well-known across the company as both of our jobs deai with people from all aspects of our org; once our reception venue went out of business I had people that he works closer with, but is not necessarily CLOSE TO, talk to me about our dilemma in passing.

About 2 weeks ago I was in the coffee bar with a lady that works in the same area of the building as my Fiance and had heard about what had happened. During this whole relocation of our venue process I have been picky as to what I accept and what I don’t – there are some venues out there that, yes may be available, but that I was not willing to compromise on. I have spent endless time, LIKE ALL OF US, making sure that my wedding fits what I want and while I knew I would have to settle to a point, I didn’t want to regret the decision either just to be done with it. 

Anyways… the lady mentioned that 10 years ago she was married in bowling alley that is located about 20 minutes outside of our city and everyone had a great time. She has kind of an "unfiltered" personality as it is and while I never told her that’s not really up my alley (no pun) she kind of seemed to keep pushing the idea on me. I ended up trying to change the subject that we would maybe change the date to later in the fall time and she mentioned that places like this are probably still available and I should look into them. She then brought up the date change and I mentioned how that is becoming a problem as we already have money deposited and already PAID for for a few venues. So I said the photog would be our biggest loss due to the money and she said "well what, $50 bucks… that’s not too bad" and I said "no, much more than that" and she asked me how much I had put down and when I told her that we have paid about 60% of the bill at $1500 she said "ARE YOU CRAZY? My band cost way less than that and that is worth much more of the money and that band was good! Our photographer was $200, can you find someone like that?" I told her that photgraphy was really important to me and that our photographer is awesome and I am looking forward to working with her and she said "WELL she better be for that outrageous price!"

How uncomfortable! I know exactly how it feels now… I would be apprehensive to post my budget too!

 

Post # 50
Member
14181 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

People are so inappropriate about money sometimes. My FI’s aunt wants us to spend $300 on a 10-minute carriage ride b/c it’ll be so beautiful. Well, she can buy that for us if it’s that important b/c i’m not shelling out that kind of money! We’re about 3K over our minimum budget. We set our budget at 15K, with 20K being TOPS.

My parents think what we’re spending on our wedding is stupid. They just want us to go to Jamaica w/ immediate family and that’s it. I just tell them, "Well you already had YOUR wedding, so let us have ours" or to my younger, more immature not-read-to-get-married friends, "well, when it’s your day, you can do whatever you want" and it usually shuts people up pretty quickly. If i’m in a REAL snooty mood, I make a comment regarding how it’s different when you can afford things or something that’s kind of a put down. Yes, sometimes I’m snide, but I tend to fight fire with fire and i try not to let people get away with walking all over me. People are going to judge you and your wedding no matter what. If it’s that big of a deal, they don’t have to come! Ha. 

I do tell my close friends what I’m spending because we are all planning our weddings. I don’t feel rude asking my friend what she spent on her photographer, venue, etc. We do it to compare, not to be ignorant. I still plan on posting my budget (which is on excel right now) on here after my wedding. If someone wants to be a B*tch and be snooty about it, then whatever, she obviously has no tact. But if my budget can help someone else out, then I don’t care! 

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