(Closed) Bees that married young………

posted 10 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
4460 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Ignore them. People who are secure in their relationships wouldn’t let it bother them. Personally, I would flip them off and tell them to go eat shit. Then they would know not to even talk to me after that. 

Post # 5
3501 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

If she’s your “friend” you should set her straight.  If she’s truely a good friend, she’ll back off.

Post # 6
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@MrsRuby: I would just say, “Well, I guess I’m lucky then.” She sounds like she might be a little jealous, to be honest, but when you say you couldn’t imagine being single, you are inviting comparisons between the two of you and that could be why she’s chiming in, because perhaps it stings a little. Maybe she wants to get married too, but hasn’t found the right person yet.

My parents have been married over 30 years and they only ever dated each other seriously. So it’s not like she is necessarily right or anything.

Post # 7
1626 posts
Bumble bee

Why oh why do people feel the need to spout off all kinds of ish all the time? If it’s a friend, set her straight at once! I had a friend who used to make remarks about the fact that Fiance and I had dated for a while. By the third time, I was like ‘Um, enough.’ and was very blunt and succint about it. If it’s a friend, make sure she cuts it off. If it’s a stranger, you can be cool and shrug it off, or you can say ‘Oh well, you are entitled to your own opionion’ or if you want to be snarky you can say ‘Opinions are like a$$h0l3s, everyone’s got one!’

Post # 8
205 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Personally, if I were dating or single, and someone said to me “I love being married, I can’t imagine dating or being single”, I would be put off. Like a PP said, it sounds like you are saying “life must suck for you poor, unfortunate single ladies”, and a lot of people would respond ungraciously to that.

That being said, people on either side will make snarky comments, and it sucks. There’s not too to do about it besides let it roll off your back.

Post # 9
4590 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I agree that she probably is just as offended by what you said as you are by what she said.  I understand, trust me. I was with my ex from 16 to 20, then there were only a few months before I started dating the hubs.  So I really don’t have any idea what its like to be single. And my bff has been single since right before I started hubs.  So yeah, I’ve made those comments to her without thinking, and she usually responds with, “yeah it sucks.” and then we start plotting on how we are going to find her the perfect man! But, she’s my bff, so we can talk that kind of stuff.

I think that you should just not make those kinds of remarks to this girl, since you know you will get the kind of reaction you don’t want.

Post # 10
5165 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I agree with @baliahi1029: that you saying “I love being married, i couldnt imagine having to date or be single” would kind rub me the wrong way if I was single.

THis reminds me of a sex and the city episode where it was the carrie and the single ladies against the married women, and its like two groups that hate each other and secretly wish they had each others lives.

Personally I do love being married, but I also enjoyed aspects of being single and dating prior to marriage. I wont talk down to my single friends because I used to be one.

Post # 11
2906 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

If that was the convo I can see how she may be offended by your comment as well. I think that nobody was trying to be mean, but things get misunderstood sometimes.

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