Bees who dated- How long 'til you found Mr. or Mrs. Right?

posted 7 months ago in Relationships
  • poll: How long did you do online dating before finding your SO?
    First person I talked to : (3 votes)
    5 %
    Not quite the first person, but pretty damn close : (12 votes)
    18 %
    1-2 months : (3 votes)
    5 %
    3-4 months : (5 votes)
    8 %
    5-6 months : (3 votes)
    5 %
    7-11 months : (3 votes)
    5 %
    1-2 years : (17 votes)
    26 %
    3-4 years : (10 votes)
    15 %
    5+ years : (9 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 2
    541 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    I did online dating about a year and a half. Most guys sucked and were jerks and I’d actually just about given up (on online dating and dating at all) but I checked my messages one day and I thought his job was cool so I decided to meet up with him but had no expectations. Now we’re married 😀 

    Post # 4
    732 posts
    Busy bee

    I did online dating for about 4 months before I considered myself to be in an exclusive relationship. That relationship lasted 6 months then I started dating my DH & I knew him from high school. 

    Post # 5
    3919 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I did online for 3-4 years on and off. Ended up meeti DH not online. 

    My high school BFF met her FI on POF after over a year of dating online. 

    My coworker was on Match for a week, talked to one guy, and they’ve been married just over 6 years. 

    Post # 6
    4374 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    First person I talked to… I’m a rare one.  There’s a very specific reason it worked out.  He just said the right things and we had a lot in common.  I deleted my online dating account as soon as I could, not before making sure he added me on Facebook.

    Post # 7
    4473 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    I dated LOTS of duds before finding my husband.  I went on first dates with probably…10-12 guys?  I have some good stories lol.

    Post # 8
    3166 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer's Beach, Grand Cayman

    I started talking to DH within 1 month of joining a dating site and met him after a month of talking. I met and went out with 4 other guys within that time frame, 2 of them were actually good catches as well but I didn’t feel like they were “the one”. When I finally met DH in person I knew he was special. 

    Post # 9
    584 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2016

    I lucked out a lot! 
    My husband was the 4th person I met after starting online dating. I had registered for the site, got super overwhelmed and a little paranoid and didn’t return for like, a year and a half. Once I decided I actually wanted to date, I went back, had one “round” (talked to a handful of guys, met the ones who asked & I thought I would be compatible with)… one the them I quite liked but our 2nd date fell through and that was it. The other two were weird and kind of put me off the whole thing again. 
    The second “round” I talked with a handful of guys, and the one who would later become my husband was the only one I met. 
    Essentially, it took 2-3 months for me, but I feel like I was really lucky, and it was just great timing on my husband’s part. 

    Post # 10
    3443 posts
    Sugar bee

    DH is the second guy I met up with on OK Cupid.

    Post # 11
    256 posts
    Helper bee

    After ending my first engagement, I was on OKCupid for about a year before I met my FI. I went on at least 1 “first date” per week during that time, it was fun!

    Post # 12
    658 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2016

    I met my first boyfriend on OkCupid after going on a handful of first dates. We were together for almost three years. Then we grew apart and before I officially separated with him I met my current husband. I ended up breaking up with my ex and eventually started dating my now husband. I met my husband in person however. I started dating at 19 and got married at 24. So it took me 5 years 😀 

    Post # 13
    7819 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    DH was the first person I corresponded with after I posted my craigslist personals ad. I could tell he was both interesting and nice. I feel super lucky that I didn’t have any bad experiences and just found him! There were no penis pics from any of my responders.

    There’s clearly some variation in the “time to success” in online dating. I think it’s all just luck, being in the right place at the right time. 

    Post # 14
    195 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    I used online dating for forever. I’ve been intrigued by meeting people online since the days of AOL chat rooms and MySpace. Since I’ve been an adult and actually meeting people to go on dates with,  most of the guys that I met were jerks and some were genuinely nice guys who just weren’t “the one”. I thought I knew what I wanted in a mate and realized in hindsight that I just wasn’t ready.

    The last time I went online to find someone, I went with the intention and hope of finding someone that I could marry. That time, I was on at least 3 different sites (Christianmingle, okcupid and POF) for two months before I met my FI. We talked for about two weeks before we met and the rest is history.

    I think that really being ready to find Mr. Right and having a very clear picture of the kind of man that I wanted to be with was a major factor in my online dating success. But then there’s the luck and “just meant to be”  factor as well. 

    Best of luck to your friends! 


    Post # 15
    54 posts
    Worker bee

    I found my SO with a one-month subscription 😁. I only gave my phone number to two guys!

    I’ve known people who feel like it takes forever to find someone worthwhile with online dating and I always tell them the same thing. Develop a sort of filtering system. Don’t go out with someone immediately after matching; it ends up wasting valuable time. Here’s what I did. First I’d chat with a guy over the dating website instant messenger. I spoke with several guys at once through that and could pretty easily weed out ones I knew were not good matches. I stopped contact with them and moved on. I ended up liking one guy so we began emailing, and when that continued to be enjoyable, I gave him my phone number. One phone conversation and I was really turned off! I never spoke with him again.

    My SO was the second guy to whom I gave my number, after about one week of emailing back and forth. He and I spent almost two weeks talking via email and over the phone before we went out on a date, so we already knew we had a great connection. We met and sure enough, the sparks flew like wildfire. Now, we have an amazing relationship and I’m just waiting for him to ask 😋💍. I’m not saying it will work that quickly for everyone, but to a certain degree you have to work the system. 

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