(Closed) Bees who have been cheated on, how did you find out about the infidelity?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: How did you find out about being cheated on? Vote multiple, but only one response for each event.
    The cheater told me about it. I had had no idea he/she had cheated. : (38 votes)
    16 %
    The cheater confessed because I was suspicious and had asked him/her what was going on. : (27 votes)
    12 %
    I found evidence in an email(s). : (32 votes)
    14 %
    I found evidence in a text(s). : (40 votes)
    17 %
    I found evidence in the browser history. : (19 votes)
    8 %
    I overheard a phone conversation. : (3 votes)
    1 %
    The person he/she cheated on me with told me. : (20 votes)
    9 %
    Someone else tipped me off about the cheating. : (33 votes)
    14 %
    Other. : (20 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 3
    2359 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I found out via Facebook that some girl had his baby, and it woulda been conceived while we were together, although we weren’t together at the time I found out.  

    Post # 4
    1122 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    My ex literally just led me to the information. He gave my the password to his myspace (this is how long ago it was) and told me to go through and save everything that seemed important (pics and what not) and j found countless messages from anothet girl, that he had spent tooons of time badmouthing to me. He tried to ddny everything, but the messages and pictures told a different story. There was also a questionable phone call once where he hadnt answered my text for a while and i called and he answered sounding panicked and winded and said ‘cant talk now’ and hung up. Then called me a few hours later and said he was shopping for my Christmas present (he didnt even give me a present that year.) In my experience, cheaters arent as good at hiding it as they think they are. 

    Post # 5
    3774 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    He worked on a farm next to where she lived, left early for work and came home late, and married her 4 months after we broke up.

    Post # 6
    522 posts
    Busy bee

    I was highly suspicious of this one girl in particular. My suspicions were correct.

    My high school sweetheart and I went to different colleges. Many people from our high school went to that college including one girl (the girl he cheats with) who had never paid an ounce of attention to my ex in high school

    We had had a bad summer between freshman and sophomore year of college and this girl started cropping up more and more often. Sophomore year almost from the start of school I had alarms going off the entire time. I asked him about it, he denied it repeatedly, calling me crazy, telling me that he was hurt I’d think that. Getting mad.

    I know something is up so I start snooping, logging into his facebook. Sure enough there’s a message from the girl’s sister saying that she’s happy they’re dating (WHAT?!) and that she hopes that he doesn’t break the sister’s heart. He responses with something like “Haha, I’d never hurt her or any girl”.

    I confront him, he gives me some bullshit, I forgive him but we’re rocky. The last straw is I see pictures of her sitting in his lap on facebook. She tagged him in each of them.

    He came clean and broke up with me for her.

    I found out later that his best friend (who was always been half in love with me) was about to tell me everything before my ex confessed. Apparently they’d been sleeping together since the summer.




    Post # 7
    4272 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    Well with my previous relationship it was a mix of things. He never took me to hang out with his friends, I never met his family, he was gone all hours of the night, he kept insulting me and talking about some other woman with great interest, other people were telling me things and then finally he told me that he needed a “break” but he will see me every weekend. I had about enough at that point, drove to his house to get my stuff and…… caught him. It was a relief actually, he was such an asshole and was just stringing me along. Catching him in the act was the best thing to ever happen to me.

    Post # 8
    2493 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    He left his e-mail open on our shared computer. Someone he had been talking to (a co-worker) also left me a message on Facebook.

    * He never physically cheated, but had many instances of sexual e-mails/photos.

    Post # 9
    12247 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I was VERY suspicious, found out his phone password by watching him put it in one the reflection of a dark window (you know how sometimes stuff mirrors in dark windows?)

    Hacked into his texts, and caught them in the act!

    Post # 10
    5242 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I found a picture on my exes camera of his ex girlfirend lying on his bed. He tried to tell me it was from when they were dating but he forgot that the digital camera shows the date and time the picture was taken! Moron!

    Post # 11
    2162 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    My Boyfriend or Best Friend from when I was 17-20 was a total douche…like I’d still wanna punch him in the throat if I ever saw him, 8 years later, kinda douche. He had given me his voicemail password one day to listen to a message for him while he was doing something, and I didn’t forget it…One night, his phone was ringing while I was about to fall asleep/kinda in twilight sleep, and he looked at the screen, then he had a voicemail, and took it outside. I probably had no reason to think it was odd, because he really could have just wanted to be quiet and let me sleep…but something felt funny. The next morning at work, I called him and he missed the call…it went to voicemail. I decided to snoop and check his messages. Sure enough, there was a message from a girl the night before, leaving her phone number on his VM. Of course, I called her before I ever talked to him…

    Post # 12
    1177 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    This was a long, looooong time ago. We dated for a year, then broke up. A few months later we got back together, but a friend of his tipped me off that he was also sleeping with his ex (whom he dated before me). I confirmed it easily (he didn’t cover his tracks very well). So I arranged for him to catch me in bed with someone else. In my experience, most cheaters have never been cheated on themselves, so I thought it was only fair for him to know what the experience was like. 

    Post # 13
    109 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    One confessed, One was texting another girl RIGHT behind me as I was watching tv. I turned around and asked him what he was doing and he looked guily as hell. Another i found out about because i was looking in my computer history to find a web page i forgot the address to, and found like hundreds of views of pictures on a certain girl’s facebook. I asked about it and he confessed he found her attractive and flirted with her but he never really did anyhting. 

    Post # 14
    285 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    Well my boyfriend got tickets to go see a concert with his brother and friends. He also bought me one but I said I would rather past… So I drop him and his brother off (they wanted to drink) and tell the I’ll be back to pick them up. So I goto my mom and dad’s to visit. I head back to pick up the Boyfriend and see if any of the other guys needed a ride…

    So I pull in front of the place concert not done wait about 10mins and people start coming out… I see his brother and friends come out (they stop to smoke a cig) Next thing I know I look over to the door and there is MY BOYFRIEND holding hands with some girl…They are both HAMMER Drunk…He doesn’t even see me and they stop and he start making out with her….

    At this point Im sitting there with my jaw on floor just staring at them making out….

    Are you F*CKING KIDDING ME!? IS HE FOR REAL!?…That moment the attack switch in my brain was triggered… I jumped out of my car and run and punch him in the face (I know I shouldn’t have hit him but I was beyond pissed) at this point EVERYONE is watching LOL  his brother(Tom) comes over and helps him up.. I say Tom put him in my car… the whole time Tom is saying Im so sorry.. blah blah… 

    I brought my boyfriend home… He slept in the bed and I slept on the couch and the next morning I pack ALL my shit into my car (I mean packed it…I was not going to be making two trips) The whole time he sat on the couch and cried..when I say cried I mean BAWLED HIS EYE’S OUT and said nothing….

    And I left and never looked back…..

    Post # 15
    1341 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Caught him in the act.

    We had only been dating for a short time. His birthday we went to a show. He got HAMMERED drunk. Caught him making out with some girl at the bar.

    He was completely hammered true, but I don’t think it was any excuse. We tried to make it work for another month or two, but my emotions were kind of turned off. I couldn’t get past it. I knew I would never trust him.

    Broke up with him… he was SUPER upset. He went in a downward spiral. Didn’t help when I bumped into him with my new boyfriend 6 months later… He ended up going to rehab. Hope he’s doing better. He’s not a bad person.

    Post # 16
    1814 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013 - Pavilion overlooking golf course scenery, reception at banquet hall

    I had suspicions an ex was cheating with one girl we both knew but never had any proof. He dumped me and then immediately started dating the girl I suspected, so he either cheated or he left me to be with her. Both scenarios are hurtful to a girl who was just getting into the dating scene, so I severed all ties (phone number, facebook, some mutual friends) and have been happy ever since 🙂

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