Bees with Long Engagements

posted 2 years ago in Engagement
Post # 31
Member
3563 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

courtja :  mine will be 16 months which I thought of as average! Seriously, I don’t think you even CAN plan a wedding in 6 months in the NYC area…things book 2 years in advance. Our first choice date actually got booked up before us by about 12 hours – and we looked (and booked) our venue before we were officially engaged (17 months). 

Post # 32
Member
8 posts
Newbee

Ours will be almost exactly two years. Eengaged september 2015 wedding September 2017. And the reason was simple, I didn’t want to compromise. 

We live in a beautiful mountain town that happens to be one of Canada’s biggest tourist attractions. Venues, vendors, hotels, everything book up way in advance. By waiting an extra year we got the venue, photographer, officiant, etc that we wanted, and it took stress off, you can take time and do things in increments instead of a mad dash. 

Not that long engagements aren’t without their hiccups. If you have female family who are of a similar age and in a serious relationship you run the risk of one of them getting engaged and booking there wedding less than two months before yours – as I have experienced! But I still wouldn’t trade my date for any other so don’t be deterred! 

Post # 33
Member
1264 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

Oh wow, around here, anything shorter than a year seems pretty short. I’m double you at 22 months!! It was a combination of wanting an outdoor ceremony and having to put a pause on wedding planning because we moved twice during that time.

Post # 36
Hostess
3836 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

courtja :  We had a 17 month engagement, mostly because we wanted a fall wedding and got engaged in the spring.  You have to book well over a year out where I live, so our time frame worked well for us.  We both also just wanted to enjoy being engaged!  We dated for 7.5 years before we got engaged anyway, so you could say we’re the type who like to take our time 🙂  I definitely feel like we could’ve planned our wedding in much less time (I’m very Type A) but enjoyed not having to rush.  My friends in the bible belt also had quick engagements (3-7 months) but all of my friends up here (I’m in DC) have had longer – ours was actually the shortest, most are around 2 years.

Post # 37
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2018

I’m a Bible-Belt dweller, too!  Engaged 12/2017. Wedding Sept/Oct 2018.  And halelujah for that!! We are paying for everything. And by “WE” I mean “ME”. Fiance is prepping to put down a massive house downpayment so I willingly volunteered to pay for our wedding. A totally unfair trade-off for him!

Women and girls I went to school with who got engaged a couple of months before me have already had their weddings…. and here is how those specific women were able to accomplish it: 

Parents’ money. Connections. Church. 

Big Church weddings are still the norm here so everyone tends to pitch in with planning. Stereotypical church weddings come with most of the logistics built-in (preacher, audio director, lighting, musician connections, reception hall, etc.), and that makes the process go much faster. Throw in the family’s perfect neighborhood clubhouses if dancing is not allowed at the church. Not to mention most parents pay for the weddings because most Bible Belt weddings are for very young couples fresh out of college.  Add in sorority sisters or sunday school pals and you’ve got yourself a wedding planning TRIBE. Everyone knows everyone and someone’s uncle owns a BBQ joint and their cousin’s girlfriend makes cakes. Also lots of money. (remember, I said the women I knew. Not all Southern Bell families have lots of money, but they usually have a big-ass church and connections for food or cake, etc.). 

 

Post # 38
Member
1055 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

We’re having a two year engagement. We’re waiting for our daughter to be older (my fiance’s request) and to save money. It also gives us lots of time to plan the wedding.

Post # 39
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

courtja :  I think sometimes guys (or just people who have never planned weddings before, regardless of gender!) just don’t really have an idea about how long it can take. I have an acquaintance who got engaged about a month ago, set her date the week before mine, and was shocked when I let her know that if she went the traditional dress salon route she probably wouldn’t have enough time. 

I’d never planned a wedding before now but I’d watched enough Say Yes to the Dress to know that the consultants LOSE their MINDS if the wedding is less than 6 months away. 

Post # 40
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Our engagement will be 22months long and it was HARD the first few months but it seriously flies by. Our wedding is less than a month away! We did it to save up and to avoid stress because we have time consuming jobs.

Post # 41
Member
863 posts
Busy bee

courtja :  We’ll be engaged for about 1.5 years when we have our wedding. We already live together and have committed to one another, so it’s sort of just a formality in my mind. We wanted plenty of time to plan and relax through planning and save extra money. There’s just no reason to rush, in our minds 🙂

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