(Closed) Bees with Step Kids…. Sticky, Sticky….Need Help

posted 7 years ago in Parenting
Post # 34
307 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

We are in California. Be prepared the judge does not always side with mediator reccomendations. After talking to our daughter and evaluating our situation the mediation counselor recommended for us to have full physical custody and ex wife to have visitation with therapy sessions etc… The judge ordered 50/50 custody with no therapy!

Post # 36
1379 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2017 - Seattle, WA

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@Coral99:  Me too!  We have her every other night, and I’m always sure to wear pants/tshirt to bed (instead of just undies or a tank & undies) on nights when she’s there, because she likes to wake up before us in the mornings and wake us up.  Even if she was my biological daughter, I still wouldn’t feel comfy walking around naked or half naked in front of her.  I guess it’s just how I was raised?  I don’t remember ever seeing my parents naked, maybe my mom in a bra once or twice when I was super young but that’s it.

Post # 37
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I wouldn’t wait until after your wedding.. I would file a report with CPS immediately. They will be the ones to evaluate and see if something is wrong. Forcing your kid to bath in front of you when they are uncomfortable and keeping them home from school for no reason is not normal. Be proactive about protecting your stepchild, especially since you know firsthand how damaging it can be. 

Post # 39
2542 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

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@Coral99:  My parents had a rough divorce. When us three kids were little we used to shower with mom or dad…but then the courts said we could no longer shower with parents after the age of five. I don’t know if that’s the cutoff, or because we were all over five…we also weren’t allowed to share the same bed with my dad on the weekends we were with him. Used to be we would all cuddle up and watch tv and fall asleep together, then the courts said we had to sleep in our own beds. We were all so little that three kids and a grown man fit on a full size bed.

Anyway, I’m pretty sure a lawyer wouldn’t be happy to hear that she’s showering with him. I’m interested in what the school thinks about what is basically truancy. He’s missing a lot of school without a doctors note.

I agree with PP that you must document everything and don’t let this get turned around on you.

Post # 40
2649 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

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@Coral99:   You don’t have to prove anything is wrong. That is CYP’s job.  

not everything inappropriate is abuse…. Except when it is.  I work with children and youth on a daily basis, and if any of my clients told me anything like this, you are damn skippy CYP is getting a call.

and FYI: when you do call and CYP finds out that you Knew but did not report in a timely matter, that will not be good for you and that hurts his chances of being placed with you when the time comes, because knowing and not reporting…. Is neglect.


Post # 41
563 posts
Busy bee

The showering issue is a bit strang. Have you discussed it with her? Does she have a boyfriend or anyone coming around? 

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