(Closed) before and after… why/when did everything change

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
4324 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

Depending on where he was deployed and what he was up to, it might be an issue of PTSD, coupled with trying to get himself into a comfortable routine. When he’s in a neutral mood,   you may want to suggest some counseling for him. 

Post # 4
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I think it might be a home from deployment thing. There are a lot of adjustments when your spouse returns after a deployment; even if he wasn’t in a war zone, there are a lot of adjustments to get used to. Especially, if for you both, he’s home ‘for good’ (or at least for a while), it has become more of a routine day-to-day thing rather than a ‘oh you’re leaving soon so let’s cherish every moment!’ sort of thing. Somehow, we seem to scrounge up more patience when it is the latter!

I would suggest seeking family counseling from the family support center – they can provide a lot of help/insight into what you’re going through, as they deal with this sort of thing all the time. And best of all, it’s free! Approach him about it when he’s in a calm and relaxed mood, and try approaching it from a ‘WE could really benefit from this’ standpoint rather than ‘you’re losing your temper all the freaking time!’ standpoint.

Good luck, keep us posted!


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