(Closed) before marriage

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We are having a surprise baby but we are living together and got married earlier in 2010. 

Are you pregnant? 

Post # 4
Member
2008 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

My best friend and her now husband got pregnant before they got married but they had been living together for eight months or so.  They just hit their one year anniversary of meeting this fall and are due in March.

Are there particular issues you’re running into?

Post # 5
Member
2872 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

My Fiance and I are getting married in April but we wouldn’t mind getting preggers right now with the wedding so close.  We live together and have for several years.

We have been in our new home almost a year and we are both ready.  I think our families would prefer us to be married before we had children just to be sorta traditional, but I dont think they would be upset if we had them before we got married either.

Are you pregnant? 

Post # 6
Member
3762 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

By the way, Mrs. Dumpling was a Weddingbee blogger that got pregnant before her wedding. 

Post # 8
Member
1775 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

@cyndistar3: what is your rationale for not living together before marriage?

Post # 9
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@cyndistar3: If you’ve already had sex and had a daughter together, I guess I don’t understand the idea of not living together? If you are old enough to have a 2-year-old child, you are old enough to be on your own making your own decisions. Your parents shouldn’t be running your life at this point.

Post # 10
Member
432 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@crayfish: agree

 

 holy moly.

Post # 11
Member
1664 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Based on your profile, I assume that you had your baby at 15?  Do you go to school?  I would try to utilize whatever resources you have in your school and/or community regarding teen parenting. 

Post # 13
Member
971 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I got pregnant at almost 19 and shortly after we found out we were expecting, Darling Husband proposed and we got an apartment together.  We had our Dirty Delete and, when she was 2, we bought our house.  We had 2 more kids without benefit of marriage and got married 8 years after our first child was born.  It was a quickie JoP wedding with immediate families only and we took them to our favourite restaurant for a “reception”. 

How did we deal with it?  We just did.  Darling Husband had started his own business at that point while I worked and went to school.  We were able to pay for all of our necessities and now both run successful businesses and had a wedding night baby who is almost 2 yo! 

Post # 15
Member
971 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

After 3 kids out of wedlock, we felt that a big, fancy blowout of a wedding would’ve been ridiculous and unacceptable.  Our youngest was 2 yo when we got married, our other two were 4 yo and 8 yo.  So, we didn’t have our 2nd baby quickly after the first … we just never got around to planning a wedding.  When I found out I was expecting #2 (we weren’t trying but we weren’t not trying either), we put a wedding on the backburner.  We discussed a small wedding after #2 and then, I got pregnant with #3.  We knew there wouldn’t be any kind of wedding other than JoP, our parents, our kids, and our siblings (and my bro’s kids).  One day, out of the blue, Darling Husband said “This is it” and we went out, got our marriage license and, on the way to City Hall, he was on the phone arranging the JoP!  When I tell you it was last minute, it was LAST MINUTE!!!! 

 

Post # 16
Member
6998 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@cyndistar3: i have no kids so i dont know how much help i am….but Hang in there! Marine Corps is a great option for your man, he will be able to take care of you and baby. OORAH! one of my brothers is in the corps :)Basic is about 3 months and then he will spend another few weeks doing is MO training and then be stationed somewhere. You can live in base housing and have that paid for. Try and set some goals with your boyfriend, fiance? hopefully setting a date will really help with looking forward.

something else im sure you dont want to hear but im going to say it anyway….Dont be in such a rush to get our of your parents house, i know rules can suck but take advantage of the roof over your head and anything they may be helping with…i swear it took me a good year or so to figure out how to make things work in “the real world”. bills, budgeting, food, gas. there were several months were i ran out of money before i got paid. im jealous of my brother living at home and saving his money – he is 21 and content with being there – i ran out as fast as i could at 18 and struggled for a few years.

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