(Closed) Beginning a PhD Program While Engaged

posted 6 years ago in College
Post # 3
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

No specific advice other than that it can be done!

My mom did hers while being a single mother of 3 kids and working full time so you can definately do it if you have the support and help of another adult. It just may not always be fun.

Congrats on the program.

I think to some degree a lot of the multitasking rules apply across the board. Plan. Make a schedule with color coded blocks that indicate study time, class time, husband time etc so that you and your husband know what you should be doing and you wont find yourself each day trying to fit it all in. you will know it will get done and when.

Plan out food. Spend a few hours sunday cooking items for the week so you have a grab and go lunch or dinner ready. Its important to eat healthy when you are busy as well so you have the energy and health to get through it all. the crockpot is your friend. As are store bought rotisserie chickens.

Identify a spot that you study best, a secluded office or a library etc so that your study time is only your study time. its not “do dishes in between time”. This was my moms rule. When she was working we were not allowed to interupt her unless it was an emergency. We were all pretty young but we managed on our own. (I think between 5 and 12)

OK I guess I did have some specific stuff I learned from my mom.

Post # 4
426 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Amanda789:  I’m starting my fourth year of a PhD program and I’m engaged.  I know a lot of people in my program who came in engaged and then got married a year or two in, so it can definitely be done.  

I would just recommend getting as much done as you can over the summer before classes start.  That’s what I’m doing.

Post # 5
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I got engaged in the first year of my PhD program and married in the second year (I do not get summers off).

Of course it is doable. But it is like anything else when doing a PhD you have to have self-control, determination and will power to prioritize your school work above and beyond everything else (wedding planning etc.)

Good Luck!

Post # 6
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

I got engaged and married during law school.  It can get a little hectic at times but make sure to break up the tasks and not to take on too many DIY projects.  We got married at the end of spring break so I had a week to finalize details and we went on our honeymoon after the semester ended.

Post # 7
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I did my engagement and wedding planning while up for tenure 😉

But I’ve known plenty of women who planned weddings during grad school. Like anything else in a PhD program, it’s about managing your time and prioritizing and getting help where you can.

Post # 8
23 posts
  • Wedding: November 2012

I am doing my phd as well as working full time.  I’m getting married this November. I think that it’s brilliant for everyone to do this. Your career continues progressing as does your life around you and it’s a good sign that both are moving forward simultaneously( if that makes any sense). So far it’s been good for me because I  have a short attention span so working an hr on wedding planningthen an hr on the PHD allows variety in my life. 

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