Being a bridesmaid in my brother's wedding…

posted 1 year ago in Emotional
Post # 16
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

This is completely ridiculous.  I agree with the previous posters who said that you just stand your ground and stay where you’re staying.  I can’t belive how rude your brother and future SIL are being.  

Post # 17
2080 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

“Future Sister-In-Law doesn’t want me getting ready with her because she wants to be with her family only which is fair enough”

This is miserly and unkind of her, especially given that they have kicked you out of your accommodations for their pretty pictures. What does she expect you to do? Get naked outside the venue? Go to a McDonald’s bathroom? And I also don’t get why you have to leave the premesis while the guys get their pictues taken? Can’t you, Oh I don’t know, just not be in the pictures?

Ugh. Please don’t entertain the idea of taking a tent, Bee. That’s ridiculous. You’re family and they’re treating you like crap. I’m sorry.

Post # 18
5564 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

Can I just add that you aren’t being irrational at all? Love the bees suggestions of challenging your brother. This is so awful for you.

Post # 19
1958 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

It’s wrong that your Future Sister-In-Law has included you as a bridesmaid, but is now excluding you from getting ready with them. This is a clear exclusion and makes it seem as if she chose you as a bridesmaid solely for appearances. It’s awful, and I wouldn’t stand for it.

I would either group text your brother and his Fiance, or I would call your brother or fiance and tell them that you can either get ready at the annex, and you’ll be sure to stay out of photos of the guys getting ready, or you will need to get ready with the bride and her bridesmaid. Emphasize that you do not have a place to get ready and you live too far away to be able to coordinate getting ready at home, especially since your fiance is getting ready with the guys.

Post # 20
3837 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Yup defs say you will have to be in the annex to get ready unless they can provide you with another suitable place to get ready. Don’t bring a tent or drive for hours on the day, that’s ridiculous. It’s very odd that the bride doesn’t want to get ready with her bridesmaids.

Post # 21
366 posts
Helper bee

Explain the situation to your brother and *hopefully* once he realizes that you might have to sleep in a TENT / get ready in a public restroom, he will change his tune. (Is is possible he just doesn’t realize the effect this is having on you?)

For the record, your Future Sister-In-Law is rude af. You can’t ask someone to be a bridesmaid and then not allow them to get ready with everyone else. She’s not honoring you (which is what a bridesmaid is), she’s taking advantage of you. 

Post # 22
647 posts
Busy bee

No it’s not “fair enough” that the bride only wants to get ready with family. You are about to be her family for one thing. And she asked you to be a bridesmaid. Part of that generally entails being together the day of the wedding. Your Future Sister-In-Law is being insanely rude. Kicking you out of the place you are staying is also insanely rude. Idk what else to say except they both sound like jerks. 

Post # 23
1545 posts
Bumble bee

Did I read that right….you seriously considered A TENT?! As in outside?! What in the actual fuck is going on here?

If they have such an issue with you sleeping and showering somewhere, then maybe you should reconsider this whole bridesmaid thing. Clearly they dont respect you and that’s sad as hell.

Post # 24
11642 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Please send your brother this thread. He and his soon to be wife are so out of line with this. Shame on them.

Post # 25
1096 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Where are your parents getting ready? Can you join your mom?

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