(Closed) Being bullied at work, what would you do….long

posted 7 years ago in Career
  • poll: What would you do if you were me

    Go PRN and get the heck out of there

    Turn down the promotion, hope it resolves and count down till move

    Strap on your big girl panties and fight no matter what

    other: please explain

  • Post # 17
    2203 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Do you think you could ask one or both of the bullies to meet you for coffee outside of work? Try to calmly say you want all of you to have a positive work environment, that you’re feeling tension between you and them and you want to resolve it. Ask them if there is something you’re doing that upsets them that you’re not aware of? Throw the ball into their court and be direct with them vs going to your mutual boss?

    Post # 18
    2777 posts
    Sugar bee

    @kansas_nurse:  those girls are bitches and they need to get over themselves. If they were so great they would be getting the promotion, not you! Don’t let them effect YOUR career that YOU WORKED HARD FOR!!! Take the opportunity and move when you can. The promotion will look so much better on your résumé and you’ll be done with them forever.

    Post # 19
    951 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    View original reply
    @julies1949:  +1

    DO NOT negotiate with terrorists!!

    Document everything that is going on. Upper management is absolutely legally and ethically obligated to do something about this.

    I’m sorry that you’re suffering but on the other side of suffering is always growth. I know it sucks now but you need this lesson. Even if it never happens to you again you may be able to help someone else through the same situation.

    Don’t cling to the ugly things that are said and done. Be confident that you are doing your best and that their behavior stems from a lack of cultivation on their part.

    Post # 20
    9916 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I was basically bullied by my boss at my former job in Philadelphia.  She made every day HORRIBLE whenever I saw her.  I don’t want to go into specifics because it still upsets me.  BUT…the HR person was her best friend, so there was no recourse for me.  What I did was try to limit my interactions with her as much as possible, to keep my chin up, and to remind myself that I was the better person.  She was fired for SUCKING SO FUCKING BADLY (me? bitter? nahhhh…) and the last year I was there it was AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME.  

    Sometimes you cannot get away from people.  You don’t deserve to be treated like that, but they might not stop.  Chin UP!  

    Post # 21
    407 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Wow.  I can’t believe grown adults are treating you this way!  Let us know how your “counseling” session goes next week and maybe we can have some more suggestions.  In the meantime, yikes.  Your job is hard enough without out these horrible coworkers!


    Post # 22
    729 posts
    Busy bee

    Welcome to nursing… I’m a CNA, and a lot of bullying goes on. They did it to me, and I would fret over it, lose sleep, etc. It didn’t stop until I outright confronted people about it, and miraculously, those people suddenly “didn’t have a problem” with me and the behavior stopped. 

    I would do whatever makes the most financial sense for you. There is no guarantee that you won’t encounter bullying at another job, and in my experience having 2 PRN jobs sucks. It’s a pain in the ass to try and juggle 2 schedules… you end up turning down hours at one place because you’re waiting on the other place to get back to you and you don’t want to double-book yourself, and then the first place ends up not needing you. One week they’re up your ass to work round the clock, and the next week they don’t need you. And I hate those 5am phone calls asking you to come in.

    Post # 23
    941 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    do NOT let them win.

    You need to contact HR, or whomever. As a teacher of young adults, I know how hard harrassment can be on the job, especially when you are in CHARGE. I get it a lot, and I’ve dealt with it in different ways. But it took a lot of learning. But you are a leader, and those bitches are under you. Remember that. Make a mantra in your head.

    What you will have to do in the meantime is let it roll off your back, don’t take that shit home with you. Try not to let it get to you. Next time someone talks off, confront them about their professionalism and how it’s not appreciated or beneficial in the work place and if they dont quit it, you will call a conference with HR. Let them know their job is at risk with the bullying.  That will definitely help them shut-up. But listen, they are still going to talk shit behind your back, but be the bigger person and continue with your job. The position is new– give it a year and this dust will have settled.

    Post # 25
    596 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    View original reply
    @kansas_nurse:  this might not be something you’re interested, but something like this is what our local news LOVES covering. Backlash from public is something everyone fears, so they woul want to make it right. To would stick it out the five months, and then be thrilled you’re leaving. 

    Of course this would be all after speaking AGAIN to HR & your boss after showing theim documented incidences. And reports from witnesses would be ideal too.

    Post # 27
    162 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I’m not giving legal advice, but I would suggest going to the office of the general counsel of the hospital to put them on notice of this.  I would use those exact words too “I just wanted to put your office on notice of this before I seek legal counsel on these matters.”  

    Post # 28
    3415 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Lodge

    Document, document, document EVERYTHING that happens. You will have your documentation as your proof and what will they have? If nothing happens with your boss, go to the person above her. I was in similar shoes once and its not fun. But believe me if you give up and they win they will do it to someone else. The pattern won’t stop. Fight. And just believe you will win. I fought with everything I had when I was at work, I left home daily in tears and eventually I got a great position in another dept and the nurse bullying me was basically let go. The doctor we worked for was leaving the hospital and no other depts would hire her because they knew the trouble she caused (she bullied a lot of people).

    Good luck. I will pray that everything will work out for you. Keep us updated.

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