(Closed) Being married…and living in seperate houses?

posted 6 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
283 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I read an article a few months ago in People magazine (I think it was Peoare, anyway) & there was a story about a couple who did this & they were completely happy.  Both just kept their original residences.  I don’t think I could do this because I love living with my hubby…that being said, sometimes when I’m overwhelmed with cooking & housework & working full time, I imagine myself in a funky appt eating ice cream in my underwear after work & watching girly movies

Post # 4
661 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’ve seen these articles recently. Personally I like the idea. Fiance and I live separately and always have. We are currently trying to figure out where we will go after we are married and are even entertaining the idea of keeping both residences. 

Post # 5
1855 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Darling Husband and I live separately due to LDR issues (kids in both states), and sometimes we joke about needing to keep separate homes once his daughter graduates in the spring.  We’ve been LDR our entire relationship (2.5yrs), and the reality of actually living together is sometimes daunting.  That said, I think we’ll still move in together, but just have spaces that are our own within the home.

Post # 6
986 posts
Busy bee

I, personally, would hate this. Mr. O is my best friend and I love spending time with him – even if we’re just doing housework or watching TV. I would hate living separately. But if it works for someone else, good for them! Maybe I should ask Mr. O what he thinks… he would probably get to watch a lot more TV in his own place. 😉

Post # 7
9691 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

It wouldn’t work for us, we love living together and spending as much time together as possible, but if both people in the marriage are happy with it and it works for them, go for it.

Post # 8
3624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@GypsyLove:  YES. hahaha I totally sometimes dream about my perfect apartment! haha 


However, I think it’s weird. If it works for you that’s great, but I really enjoy living with my husband even when he gets on my nerves!


Post # 9
2551 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My boss & his wife live in separate homes. He lives in northern CA & she lives in southern OR so they’re about 2 hours apart. They take turns visiting each other on the weekends & holidays. I think it’s very odd, but it seems to work well for them. It’s a second marriage for them both & both their children are all fully grown. I think it’s more a convenience factor- they’re both set in their ways & routines and don’t want to mess that up, also she owns a hair place in her OR city & he is a partner at a law firm in his CA city. 

Would not work for us at all, we love spending our downtime & busy time together. I consider us best friends & it would be heart-wrenching to only have weekends together… 

Post # 10
2107 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Personally, I would hate this.  I can’t even get to sleep properly without Darling Husband in the bed, and I love having him around during the day, even if we’re doing completely separate things.  I’m sure it works for some people, but it never would with us. 

Post # 11
182 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Definitely would not be for us. We don’t currently live together, but when we’re married, we will. He is over at my house or I am at his every day (minus a few weekends) since we’ve started dating, and even that is not enough time for us! We would hate being apart after we are married, and in fact, that’s one of the things we’re looking forward to–being together all the time!

Post # 12
7173 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’ve thought the best living situation would be two houses that are connected by a long hallway – kind of like individual houses on separate wings of the property. 🙂  That way, you could still have sleep overs (that would be the plan every night, IMO), yet have lots of space and be able to make lots of noise in one wing while the other is sleeping … or have a retreat if one person was sick, but not be too far away. 🙂 

I don’t think I could live in a completely different house/area of town, though!


Post # 13
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

@.twist.:  “However, I think it’s weird. If it works for you that’s great, but I really enjoy living with my husband even when he gets on my nerves!”


I could never do this and find the whole concept really odd.  But to each their own.  If it works for these people, who am I to say they shouldn’t?

Post # 14
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

whatever floats their boat, but it doesn’t float mine.

Post # 15
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t think this would work for us in our current relationship, but I would very much love to have a second home or a getaway apartment some day, where either of us could go to just enjoy some alone-time or have friends visit, and we could also enjoy together.

I love having Darling Husband around, and since we both telecommute we are around eachother every waking hour.  And it’s almost always just lovely. But even though I really miss him when he travels for work, I sometimes enjoy being on my own for a bit.

Post # 16
2269 posts
Buzzing bee

I read a study that mancaves are great for a relationship. Maybe this is similar? Being together but each person still having their own space.

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