(Closed) Being specific on R.S.V.P’s

posted 7 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Maybe “we have reserved __ seats for _________&________, hope to see you there!”

Post # 4
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would think that if you reserve two seats in someone’s honour then they should be able to bring whomever they please. If that wife’s husband can’t come she might feel really uncomfortable attending the wedding entirely by herself – and no good hostess would want to make a guest feel that way.

Post # 5
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

My RSVPs are online and so I have entered the exact names. They can only rsvp for the actul people I invited and cant add anyone else. I’m not sure how you would do that in your case though.. maybe spread the info by word of mouth?

Post # 6
Member
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Anxiouspeanut: The invite is only for the people directly addressed on the envelope.

If someone tries to substitute someone else, the best thing to do is just address those RSVPs as they come back by just giving a call and saying “I’m really sorry your husband isn’t about to make it, but unfortunately space does not permit adding another guest in his place” or something along those lines. But, if you have the room why not let her bring someone in his place. Technically she should call and ask you first rather than just putting it on the RSVP.

Unless your invite says “and Guest” the names on the envelope allow for no substitutions.

Post # 9
Member
5657 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

@Miss Lilac: I disagree. I don’t think guests should be able to bring whomever they want to my wedding. If they feel unfomfortable going alone if their spouse cannot make it, they can call me and ask if they can bring someone who was not invited.

Post # 10
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Anxiouspeanut: If they are the guest of someone close to me and it makes the person I love and want in attendance more comfortable than beinig there alone? Absolutely! I have been to several weddings of FI’s college friends while we were still just dating where I haven’t known the people getting married and they didn’t seem offended in the least – in fact, they were happy to meet me.

If you had room for her husband then you have room for an alternate guest – saying that space won’t allow is such an obvious fib that I would be offended by having that used on me.

Post # 11
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@DeathByDesign: Yeah, I agree. I’m sure the average person would touch base with you and ask. But if not, it’s just not something I would get my panties in a bunch over. If you’ve accounted for a certain number of people and the guest isn’t an axe murderer what difference does it really make?

Post # 12
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@Miss Lilac:  I think your example seems a little different than what she’s getting at.  At those weddings, you were probably the arranged +1 for your Fiance, but here she’s trying to clarify that the invites are for the invited only.  It’d be weird if a married couple I invited couldn’t make it as a couple and the wife invited one of her girlfriends.  I don’t even know what to make of that!

Post # 15
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@M.Ruder: I guess I just don’t see the big deal. There are far more things in planning my wedding that I can channel my energy into than worrying about if one of the 60 or however many people I invite is not who I specifically invited. I’ve got better things to go all bridezilla over.

Post # 16
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@Anxiouspeanut:  I’d say not worry about it though and deal with it if it happens.  Better not to worry about stuff until you absolutely have to, but I hope you won’t!

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