(Closed) Best friend…or not?

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
9527 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Take a few days to cool off. This doesn’t sound like a personal snub and it honestly sounds like you will regret not having her apart of your wedding in October. 

Post # 3
Member
4252 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I’m guessing it was a “family only” thing.  I really don’t think it was a personal attack or anything, I just think she wanted something simple.  Maybe offer to help her throw a reception if she’s interested, or a “girl’s night” in place of a bachelorette party.  I get why you took this personally, but you really can’t.

Post # 4
Member
312 posts
Helper bee

Did other people get invited? Maybe they just had a little thing. My friend of 25 years got married last summer and I was not invited. I was a little disappointed until I learned it was only immediate family. She is going to be one of two bridesmaids in my wedding this July regardless because I love her and we have been friends since first grade!

Post # 5
Member
336 posts
Helper bee

Maybe your friend doesn’t think it’s a big deal because this is her second marriage / wedding? I would just talk to her about it if it bothers you that much. Like ask about the details of the wedding and casually mention that you would have loved to see her get married (with a positive tone – no resentment!). It’d be better to know the truth (likely that she didn’t mean any ill intent) than to torment yourself with hypothetical situations.

Post # 7
Member
297 posts
Helper bee

She told you she was getting married, and got married three days later? Wow! It seems like it was a small, family only thing! Don’t know! I understand the hurt feelings though. 🙁

Post # 10
Member
1042 posts
Bumble bee

MrsShipman:  I’m not sure why you didn’t say “picture-schmicture! I want to be there in person!”, especially if you’ve guys been best friends for 20 years…. 

Post # 11
Member
559 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

MrsShipman:  You guys have been friends for a long time. I would tell her that you feel sad you weren’t able to be there for her wedding, and maybe ask if anything has changed between you two?

Post # 12
Member
1424 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

Oh wow. I feel bad about my wedding now haha. My best friend isn’t invited. But nobody else is either, it’s just going to be me and Fiance. I can understand you feeling upset but it does sound like a small wedding. I don’t think you said but is anyone else invited or is the wedding going to be like mine, no guests? If there are guests and she just hasn’t invited you then I would be wondering why but otherwise I wouldn’t be too bothered. The reason we’re not having guests is because we hate the thought of being the centre of attention and can’t imagine a more perfect say than just being the two of us. I honestly think I would hate my wedding if I had guests not because of the people who would be there but just because I wouldn’t like trying to please everyone and having people watching me haha. 

Post # 13
Member
2969 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

MrsShipman:  I can understand feeling hurt, but I think this is one of those things where she wanted to tell you so that you didn’t find out AFTER they got married, but I think they wanted it to be between the two of them.

The only thing you can really do is be happy for your friend that she is happy and married to someone that she loves.

It’s nothing personal, so don’t take it that way.

Post # 14
Member
1151 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

You should be happy for your friend.  This is not about you.  

Post # 15
Member
249 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

MrsShipman:  You can be sad that you weren’t there to witness them getting married. But- you should also be incredibly happy that she is married to the man she loves. Perhaps the situation worked for them and they went for it. I’m sure they had no intention of hurting anyone.

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