- 5 years ago
- Wedding: April 2014
My BFF’s wedding is Saturday and she’s having it at her FBIL’s backyard. I went over yesterday to get in some more girly bonding time before the wedding and to help her set up for the wedding.
Well, I already know her Fiance is a miserable jerk, and I’ve heard stories about his family, but dang. I wasn’t prepared.
So we spent the morning cleaning her house, getting it ready to be left on its own while they honeymoon. Fine, sweet, we have coffee and we vacuum. Then we mosey over to her FBIL’s house.
Bees, I shit you not, one of the most awkward times I’ve ever had. And I only wanted to help set up and decorate.
The FI’s brother is a stone wall. He didn’t say much, didn’t smile, hardly acknowledged us. His wife was nice enough but very awkward to be around. Just something off with that one.
The FI’s grand aunt was there as well. And though she spoke very little, everything she had to say was disparaging toward my BFF.
I took my BFF aside and asked her, “Did they know I was coming?” I felt like such an intruder to their house and yard. I felt completely and utterly unwelcome. I felt like they had no idea I was coming. Yet she assured me she had already told them I was coming and they said they were completely fine with it.
Well, as BFF, myself, and Auntie Jerk were outside working on decorating the trellis the happy (ha!) couple will be standing under for the ceremony, every idea BFF had was instantly shot down with a sneer. Everything had to be Auntie Jerk’s way. Did BFF once stand up for herself and her vision and say, “Well, thank you for your opinion but I’ve always seen it this way…”? NO. She bended and bended, “Oh, I guess you’re right. My way was stupid. Thanks.”
Bees, I got so. sick. of this treatment that I threw down my wire cutters on the grass, looked A.J. straight in the eye and told her and BFF, “It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks. It’s YOUR wedding, BFF, and it’s YOUR ideas that count. YOUR opinions that matter. Not mine, not hers, not anyone’s but yours and FI’s.” A.J. did not appreciate this. BFF smiled at me sadly but shook her head and submissively said, “No, no… A.J. is right.”
It was all I could do not to explode. It really, really, really sucks to see my formerly highly independant best friend go from smart and self-reliant to a complete and utter pushover, subserviant to anyone around her who seems slightly dominant.
I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do at the wedding besides hang out with her family and stay the hell away from his. I think after the ceremony I may have a headache and need to leave. I feel so awful knowing my best friend could do so much better and deserves so much better, but she’s settling for this douche and his douchey family.
You know what her line is? “There’s always divorce!” Yeah, that’s the attitude you want to have going into a marriage. Keepin’ it sacred.