Post # 1
Up to three weeks ago we were down a groomsman. He made a sudden annoucement that he would be moving clear across the country to Vancouver but he should return in time for the wedding. The fact that he didn’t get his suit fitted when I asked back in February and it was June, I got a sneaking feeling that I should call in the back up. You may wonder why I had a backup groomsman. Well, my bestman who is my FI bestfriend lives in St. Vincent and said that he might not be able to come due to financial restraints. Well, seeing that he is my Fiance closest friend I forked out the $1000 (I would like to note that money is really tight with the wedding, buying a new condo downtown and I am the only one with a steady income) and bought his ticket to Toronto.
Everything was good, except my bestman was suppose to be in Toronto right now. Where is he you might ask? Still in St. Vincent. He didn’t get his visa on time so now he missed the flight. Not a big deal? Thats what I thought, get the visa and jump on the next flight to T.O. Right?
Wrong,he decided that he will not come after all, because he doesn’t know when he would get the visa.
Here comes the best part, even though it was on my credit card, the money is refunded to him as credit for the next time he flies. He told my Fiance that he is sorry and he will try his best to pay me back.
Don’t get me wrong, I love him like a brother, but this is getting a little crazy. He should just have the credit transftered into my name, that way he wouldn’t have to "pay me back".
We have no replacement. And that guy who said that he would be back in town is now saying he doesn’t know if he will even attend the wedding. He may or may not be in Toronto at that time.
Post # 3
How many groomsmen are left? And how many bridesmaids do you have?
Post # 4
I have 6 groomsmen, and 7 bridesmaids in total.
Post # 5
Are you worried about having an uneven bridal party? If so, then I would say don’t stress about it. I’ve been to a few weddings with an uneven Bridal Party and it’s been totally fine. At my friends’ wedding a few years ago they had 9 BM’s & 12 GM’s and it was awesome. With 6 men and 7 ladies, for your group pics it would look really cute alternating starting with one of the BM’s. As for recessing down the aisle after your ceremony, you could have the best man walk either alone or escort 2 of the bridesmaids, then pair up the others.
Post # 6
Just to update,
Thursday at 2 in the morning another groomsman dropped out. The excuse this time was that the suit cost too much money. I thought to myself, "You realized this at two in the morning, one week before the wedding."
And he was the first guy to get his fitting. So at 3 am I found a replacement. My closest guy friend who was willing to step in just in the nick of time.
So now the numbers are even, but we have a week before the wedding. I am not making any more revisions to my programme. I just hope that it stays the same. We have replaced almost all the groomsmen. Only two are of the original 8 picked are still in the party. Thankfully one of my BMs got preggers shortly after she got married (Oct) so her due date is July 14, two days after my wedding. So she is out. We were down to 7, so its a double blessing. A new Godson, and one less groomsman to replace….
Today is my Fiance bachelor’s party and the people who were planning it went MIA yesterday and today. So he is left planning his own party. I want to help him but he refuses my help. He says that I have too much on my plate to worry about his party.
The thing is its for 60-70 people. Because the guy who was planning invited everyone under the sun.
My Fiance has mostly female friends, which is okay with me. Its like that movie, " I love you Man." Its just hard to get a group of good guy friends to stand up for him. I have a lot of girlfriends so thats why my party is so large.
Post # 7
Oh that really stinks. I have never heard of that happening! I hope that nothing else changes. That seems really odd for them to do that. Good Luck with the rest of the wedding and if anyone else quits, oh I would let them hear it!!
Post # 8
Ugh this sounds like a nightmare I am so sorry! It really drives me crazy when people commit and then flake out on stuff at the last minute. It’s just so rude and self-absorbed. I’m referring here more to the party situation than the whole VISA thing, although why he wouldn’t have had them put the credit in your name is ridiculous. I’m hoping and praying that my girls and my FI’s guys come through because personally I’ve bent over backwards for my brides in the past every time I’ve been asked to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man because that’s what you take on when you agree to it and if I don’t get that back from mine, it’s Bridezilla time for reals.
Post # 9
This is a nightmare! I feel really badly for your Fiance…hope he’s doing all right! I would be furious and sad if it were my friends flaking out on me left and right.
I say just put on a happy face and forget about it and have a good day with an uneven bridal party.
Post # 10
I don’t understand when this happens to guys. All they have to pay for (well, other than an airline ticket in your case) is a tux and then a bachelor party. Women have to pay for a dress, shoes, hair, makeup, nails, bridal shower, bachelorette party, accessories, and the list goes on. He should have been a man about it and told them to credit you for the amount and not just kept it with the hopes that one day he’ll be able to pay you back. That’s what most people would have done. And if he was that strapped for cash, he shouldn’t have said yes to your FH when he asked him to be his best man. I’m sorry you’re going through all of this! You don’t need to have this hassle on top of everything you have to worry about as a bride!
Post # 11
You poor thing! my Fiance has two best friends. He was considering either as his Best man. The one hes known the longest, I honestly talked him out of because he’s not reliable. His other best friend, who mind you live in CA and we’re in NY, would WALK her to get to our wedding! The guy he’s known longer told us he probably won’t be able to make it because of money reasons and my Fiance is glad that he won’t be in because in the back of his mind, he knew. Our wedding party on the guys side consists of his best friend, my Brother-In-Law, my very good friend, my brother and my cousin. I made sure that we had enough dependable people who loved us and would be there come h-e-double hockey stick or high water. I really hope everything works out for you guys! Good luck!