Post # 1
So, my Future Mother-In-Law finally wants to give some input now that I have to send out the wedding invitations next week (she was late on numerous addresses and still hasn’t given me some). I ordered the invitations months ago and it is too late to order anymore. We are inviting a total of 340 people and are hoping around 300 show. My Fiance told me today that his mom wants to know if a couple she invited who can’t go if they can just “hand off” their invitation to their grown daughter and her husband because she thinks they can go.
Ummmm, no, I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works. I instructed my Fiance to tell his mom that we are inviting her first cousins only, not their children (which I already told her numerous times) and there is no “handing off” of invitations if you can’t go. WHAT THE HELL?
Post # 3
Definately have Fiance squash that now:)
Post # 4
OMG what is wrong withsome people? Just because someone can’t Come doesn’t mean you get to invite randoms that the bride and groom didn’t want to be there in the first place….if you wanted their daughter there you would have sent her her own invitation!
Post # 5
I know! Believe it or not saving myself $80 per person wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. I think she is just panicking now because she realizes that she should have given me her list of people 8 months ago when I asked for it and now it’s down to the wire.
Post # 6
Tough shit for her then isn’t it 😉
Post # 7
Hmm… sucks to be a procrastinator. But no, I’d draw a hard line now that invitations are not to be passed along.
Post # 8
Some people are so unbelievable! I’m so sorry, but your Fiance has to squash this now or it will be how she acts from now on! YIKES!
You are absolutely right, there is no “handing off” invitations! How absurd!
Hopefully your Fiance takes a stand, cause if he doesn’t you will have to!
Here’s something to make you not feel alone:
My sisters Mother-In-Law SECRETLY ordered and sent out more invitations behind my sisters back! THEN called all those people and said, due to financial constraints of the bride and groom, you were invited, but it would be best if you didn’t come! My sister didn’t find out about it until 3 years after they were married! How’s that for a laugh!!
Let us know what happens!! Good luck!
Post # 9
wow. While I am appalled I do wanna say while it’s obvious these people didn’t know better they were probably thinking it was a) less formal and b) that if they couldn’t go, thier kids would represent lol! but MAN that’s crazy.
@DisneyBrideCKB: HOLY COW she ordered invites behind her back! o.m.g.
Post # 10
@DisneyBrideCKB: Are you serious?! Oh my gosh.
OP: What the hell? Lol. Some people are so crazy. Fiance still keeps bringing me names from his family. No. Invites are ALREADY OUT. No. I even had a “last call” for the guest list and everyone was like, “looks good.” Then I get, “Well, what about FGMIL’s sisters from another state?” <– Yes, future grandmother in law. And the sister’s that she sees once a year. Or FFIL’s other work friend. What? People need to chill.
Post # 11
@DisneyBrideCKB: I bet she was wondering why she was getting bad looks from some people for three years! LOL! that sucks. I hope all is well now.
Post # 12
Yup, true story, you can’t make that kind of stuff up! 🙂
Its rediculous how people get during wedding planning. I’m convinced it truly brings the worst out in people.
At the end of the day, medsie35, you have to do what is right for your Fiance and you. You are in the process of building a new foundation for your new family, and this is the time you have to set the ground rules with your IL’s as well as your own family.I hope he steps up to the plate!
Its a tough time and I don’t envy your situation at all!
Post # 13
@DisneyBrideCKB: My Mother-In-Law did the same thing. She asked us for extra “courtesy” invites, and when we said no, she had copies printed anyway and sent them to the people she claimed would be affronted not to receive one. She told Darling Husband after it was done and he was like, “Fine, but if any of them RSVP yes, you’re the one that’s going to have to tell them they can’t come.” Luckily none of them RSVP-ed at all, but we were still not pleased.
She also tried the hand-off argument before that too…some people are just unbelievable. Mind you, she had 300 people at her wedding and considered that “small”, so she must have been going out of her mind trying to comprehend our tiny little 50 person wedding.